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Coming to terms with reality

Coming to terms with reality

Hi Readers, i am suffering from "mental health issues" and it is an ongoing, daily battle. I am pretty much constantly wrestling with the thoughts going on in my mind. And my psychical life seems too be suffering for it. (There is a huge difference between physical and mental ) something is definitely not right! So each day I'm waking up and going about my routine. And over the last few days, weeks and months. I have been noticing changes in my mentality toward myself, others and life. And some questions such as, what is my life about? And what should my objectives be? Have arisen... of course like we all are, I'm subject too making decisions... and there has been the same options in front of me time and time again for months on end. And it becomes rather draining and mundane. And i feel myself going around in circles like something simple just ain't connecting.

I enjoy writing, art, music. And peace of mind... walking, reading, meditation. Taking care of myself. Socialising. Etcetera. Getting ahead, getting in front. Planning, dreaming and so on. And do my best to look after myself. While accepting that it can only ever be so much.

But there just something not quite right. And I'm suffering for it on a daily basis. And I'm tired and fed up with going through the same stuff everyday. And in all honesty. Alot of my suffering comes from prospective and thought processes.

Does anyone wanna talk with me about some things that might help? In particular dealing with people no matter who they are. Can be very stressful and cause lots of procrastinating about pros and cons. In particularly people who i think about reaching out to for support. Because of dilemmas dramas and social dynamics. And picking up on things that "aint really happening" "gut feelings type of stuff " "intuition" that type of thing. And enjoying time with people is great! I just tend to be overly preoccupied with symptoms to be worried about socialising sometimes "Symptoms which involves others"

3494 replies

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In response to: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

thanks @Shaz51

I have managed to detach myself from my detached state that my psychiatrist diagnosed on thursday...

so everything is just floating about me..

how are you and mr shaz...

have you managed to see kidney specialist yet?

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

are you ok @Former-Member, if you want to chat I am here

and thank you I see the kidney specialist this thursday coming and then see another specialist about my having too much iron in my body

In response to: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

Hi @Former-Member

Yea fridge and freezer arrived. It was an impulsive spare of the moment purchase through a no interest loan service. That deal with white goods. Household appliances. So i thought I'd try and set myself up.

I got a $3k low interest loan through a service which specialises in low income earners. And it just dwindled away so quickly. Yet will be 3 years at $42 a fortnight to pay off. 75 payments.

And then the price of cigarettes is going through the roof each year and it's putting huge amounts of pressure and stress on me. Really stressing me out actually.

In all honesty mohill. Each day is an uphill battle. I'm lacking one of my most important needs. for a fair portion of the time. No social interaction. Loneliness. Isolation. Being a recluse and hermit.

I'm torn in two about this smoking vs no smoking and quitting thing hey.

Feeling rather unwell.

Eude

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

hello @eudemonism

hey eude I logged back in to see if you had replied....I was a little concerned and thought perhaps the trying to give up smoking was just one more hassle for you...

as easy as it is for me to say please do not be hard on yourself as giving up smoking is now considered to be as difficult as giving up heroine.

isolation...non socialising is the pits....

meeting people with whom we connect is difficult...

the best way is through common interests...sporting clubs...book clubs...music interest...writing workshops...all have to be within a reasonable distance from where you live..as well as not too costly..

the other option is of course volunteering which you are most likely sick of hearing....however,,,there are so many different things where you can volunteer now...

how is purrpurr now? fully recovered from operation?

I have heard of people making friends through meeting at the beach whilst walking their dog...

wishing you a brighter day tomorrow

letting you know am here to listen when I can...

you do matter...do not forget that please...

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

hello @eudemonism

missed your conversation

hing that you are ok

I know that you are struggling with giving up smoking...so hard..

feeling isolated.. Not nice is it..

when I have long periods of isolation ..just smiling at anyone and polite conversation with people in shops helps..there are many of us who go through this..

in fact the most cinfident people find it difficult to have an in depth conversation about something of importance...

I have had the best conversations with people I least expected to...

do you know why?

because I bothered..

not because I am some sort of martyr or reborn or ...??

because I made an effort to start a conversation.... Then...

strive for what you want regardless of your mental illness...the insight that you have gained will take you to further places than you imagined..

Work hard at not letting your past influence your now and the future..

lastly don't forget to talk to me here. ....

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

Hello @eudemonism

hoping that you are ok and safe....

talk when you can..

even a quick hello..letting me know that you are safe..

you do matter...

In response to: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

@Former-Member

Have really cheap phone to type with
Is not really easy too write lengthy messages
Dropped my old phone and screen went on it
In general am doing OK
Apart from mental illness symptoms
Medication side effects
And dealing with giving up smoking withdrawal symptoms
Big problems with those three things
Makes life very difficult

Am managing day to day responsibilities quite well
However something always manages to overwhelm and stress me
I'm big enough and ugly enough to look after myself
I've noticed that with all changes come lifestyle adjustments
That's the really hard bit
Basically like learning to live again

Am turning away from the right choices for myself at the last moment because of fear and resentments caused by other people and resorting to my comfort zone which is not good?

Am responsible for myself and my actions at this point even though thoughts feelings and actions process is messed up due to life experience

Good days. Bad days. Highs. Lows.
Nothing is perfect.
However I would like to be a more positive action in the moment person
And be able to sort through the nosense in my mind easier

How is things going for you?
Christmas and new years is not far away

How are your older friends going?
It's good to be social and keep connections going

Have you heard from your eldest son recently? And how is the rest of your family doing?

I keep distance from my family even at the best of times. Due to fears and resentments
Plus I know they have their own lives and problems and so on
However I do enjoy some family time every now and again

Have come such a long way in my life and been through so much mental anguish luckily a lot of it has subsided but unfortunately I'm still left to deal with my thoughts feelings and reactions

It takes a tough and resilient person to deal with reality and get on with life and do well not easy for anybody

Basically I can't at this stage openly and properly deal with reality past present or future in a healthy way or way I see as suitable or acceptable and I pay the price

Always looking for a way out
Always looking to get cut corners
Always looking for the cheat sheet

All for now

your friend eude

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

Hello @eudemonism

thanks for replying. .I am using iPad and is a pain..

we are currently away for 7 days....

older son contacted me several times wanting money urgently again...he has become more verbally abusive and I have had to let him know will not tolerate..

too hard to explain but his expectations are drop everything and meet his needs immediately regardless that we are not in an area to deposit money into his account immediately...so all became very distressing..I sent text msg asserting will not listen to verbal abuse...at the same time still love him...so will pay in his Christmas money tomorrow..

still waiting on hearing results for sister's possible bone marrow disorder..

Well done for persevering with stop smoking...congratulate yourself every day that you don't have one...

turning away from choices due to other's negative attitudes is not good for eude..

have you tried stating that it might not be acceptable to others...but is the best for you..

time to believe in eude

how are mister Mac and purrpurr?

take care..write when can..

friend mohill

In response to: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

@Former-Member

I'll be doing a lot of reflection In the time leading up to and after the new year. No need to worry about me. I'm getting all of it sorted out bit bye bit.

Friends are hugely important to wellbeing. I just questions what binds people together. And where I stand in amongst it and who I am as a person to them.

My values. What I stand for. My boundaries. My goals. My life. Looking after myself.

Eude

In response to: Re: Coming to terms with reality

Re: Coming to terms with reality

Hello @eudemonism

good to hear from you..

yes you have reminded me that this time of year is an opportunity for reflection..

Friendships can be so different with various people in our lives as in to varying depths of how much we give and how much we receive in return..honesty and trust are terms that are so important...also how we grade the level of friendships that we have with different individuals..

we do not have to reveal everything about our past with someone ..we can choose to share what we are doing now..dreams for the future..

we are always in control of how much we want to reveal..share..in most cases do not need to..

friendsip is about enjoying time in each other's company...then recognising honesty and learning when and when not to trust...sometimes taking a risk but if we have not revealed too much about ourselves initially the risk of disappointment is far less..

your values are a part of you ..Important in my thinking...to stick to them and not be swayed by others..therefore being true to yourself..ourselves..

Everything that you said makes sense.....you know this and need not be concerned..

I am very aware that you have had much time thinking deeply..you are working very hard at being the best you can be...true to yourself..

be proud of this...there are many people in life who appear to have it all...yet they have no concept of the depth of character that you have..

hope to hear from you soon..

take care

your friend mohill

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