Re: Learning about Relationship Boundaries

I have had that same thought as well... sometimes the people who are louder and more in people's faces do seem to get the most attention. Where as people who are quieter and do put up their 'strong side' all the time for people to see.. dont get listened to as much. my psychologist said I have the best strong face she's ever seen lol.. And i do present a strong confident professional person at times... and ive had to learn to ask for help this year for the first time. I cant remember if you have someone ( a counsellor or psych?) if not keep pushing, finding asking for what you need until you feel like you've got what you need,

here listening!

Lj

Thank you for taking time to read and reply lj.

It means a heap that you bothered. I get that you are strong and that in the midst of intense serious dramas you can look for positive things and help others.

I gave up on my last psych a year ago.. she was so light weight .. she meant well, but I had to look after her cos she doesnt do "blood" as she says .. I got sick of fixing her superficiality and cutsey ways

I pleaded with GP send me to a psychiatrist .. but he didnt think I needed it. He did save my life ... as I would have "completed" .. without him.

I am going with new Carers VIc psychologist lady and the good thing is that she and my new GP are within walking distance .. sort of.

Just got back from picking son up and going to Officeworks .. bought printer/scanner and supplies so son is finally taking seriously setting up a proper office

That last post was upsetting to write but it helps not being in a vacuum and having a response.Thanks again.

I'm glad you are getting some of it 'out' so to speak on here. Yeah, it is really important to find someone who you can talk openly with in the style and manner that you need to. I hope that things go well with the Carers Vic psychologist. Maybe time to get a bike, or roller blades hehe? You could always ask your GP to send you to a psychiatrist again, just saying that you would like a second opinion on your diagnosis/medication options (if you are on any!)

Keep writing, i dont always have the energy to write much back, but am listening and caring!

LJ

Bloody hell roller blades ..

Your lego pic reminded me of my old photos with girls. It is good for me to come to some "closure" re my girls and move along with life now.

Hi Appleblossom

Just reading your letter it reminded me that I went to an Oesteopath with my neck problems. She was very helpful. Said that neck problems were a result of unrealistic expectations (of myself). I just thought they might be of help to you too. They sort of combine physio with talk psychological, very interesting.

My osteopath is another health professional who saved my life. Been going to her for 10 years and she doesnt try to over service me either so I trust her. I prefer to do exercises at home to the quick click fix. I dont mean to whinge. I understand its causes, my neck is mostly well managed. it is chronic 25 years. It does mean that I cant take pressure.

My situation was also unrealistic expectations of mother and others upon me it is not just a psychological self pressure. The discs went out a long time ago.Thanks @hopeandsupport

Hi @Appleblossom and @hopeandsupport

I have chronic headaches and migraines - probably neck stuff but i hate going to the drs or anythng for physical stuff ugh... really should look into it though! What does an osteopath do? are they different from a chiro?

Lol @Appleblossom hope i made you smile re the roller blades! how about a segway lol?!

Half my headache problems is probably tension too, hard to know, have had so many injuries over the years I wouldnt have any idea where to start lol!

LJ

I prefer ostoes and physios to chiros as they do more soft tissue prep work and not just click.

Chiros can be good but probably made my back overly mobile and I would click in and out rather than stabilise. Shop around. I cant afford much so am stingy about seeing them.

I used to swim, walk and ride push bike so was fairly fit but repetitive strain .. too much study, piano, renovating and kids etc. and then frustration at not be able to communicate .. or being blocked etc.

An Oesteopath talks to you while they are massaging and manipulating your body, and they give you exercises to do. I think they have knowledge of psychology, but not sure, all I know is thatshe managed to make me ball my eyes out! I also developed Occipital Neuralgia while I was caring for my mother which comes from the neck also but it seems to come and go. I have notes to refer to that she gave me so I can remember what I am supposed to be doing lol

We hold a lot of energy and strain in our bodies. I did primal therapy early in my 20s while I was at uni and studying Freud and Lacan etc. Bodywork of some kind is so important, I vary my approaches as I have been at it a long time.I also have done it on a shoe string, second hand books etc. and can only afford a bit of complementary/alternative medicine practitioners. I have plenty knowledge but not much support and needed health system network to survive at all.

I do have a home. For some reason everything is wound down. My house is messier than usual. Sick of hassling son. I have turned into a teenage boy trying to get along with him. I am too much a chameleon, too flexible which added to strain on my back. maybe I am also taking stock. Seeing the truth about my mother's family and learning to rely on myself.

Thanks @hopeandsupport and @Former-Member