when is it time for hospital

Ok today has been a very loooong day

so first up the DRS
I went into see the gp and explained to her about the situation with the medications, what happened at the last psychiatrist appointment on saturday. I explained to her my situation and I asked if she was going to ring my mother and she said nope not a chance. I can see what drama a phone call has caused for you already. And I was telling her about them wanting to come to an appointment with me even though I didnt want them too and she has pretty much said they are not coming in here unless I say they are. If its going to cause me that much distress them being in here shes not letting them in to the appointment. Shes going to call my psychiatrist and get more of the story as I didnt get to hear the whole conversation to start with casue it wasnt on speaker phone.
Ive asked her to speak and discuss if a medication ive suggested will work for me. But im still in the predicament that I cant hide it but if I have them at home then they will get thrown out.
I do need to be on them at least until I can get better abit more and then start to at least reduce the dose but I cant keep going as I am. I go back to the gp on friday and ill find out how the converstaion went between them 2. she asked about the cyst but didnt get into it or checked it either.

PSYCHOLOGIST-
the first session was really nerve wracking. She doesnt look anything like I had imagined. She was nice and we talked about the dignoses, the situation at home, my past and the event and a few other things. It was quite draining and nerve wracking.
I went to the wrong place to start with and that didnt help the nerves either.
We will be having a session each week except next week but after that its every week after that.
She wont be ringing my mother either and she did say to me that she is required to write a report to victoms f crime but its only very breif and pretty much just sayin yep she thinks I need therapy for this event. Thats ok with me. So I guess it went ok today, just very draining and brought up a lot of memories.

Tomorrow I have a paddock cleaning job, and have to do the sick horse as well- despite being away from home I dont seem to be doing much RELAXING!!
then on friday I have the gp and then I also have time- I hope- to meet a new horse and see how that works out.

@Owlunar@Former-Member@Former-Member@Former-Member@Anony18 and everyone else as well

I am glad your appointments went ok

@Former-Member @outlander

I understand how controlling some mothers can be - mine kept it up for most of my life - enough to keep me away from the family for years at a time anyway

Actually I got pretty assertive about the whole thing - amazing how bitter my mother was but

Hey - when I was 20 my mother controlled everything except my going to night school etc - and I started going out with by HTB - and she said I changed then - and I thought - I should hope so - at that age - everyone should change

But controlling mothers exist and it is very hard to find one's feet - sometimes it means leaving forever - but I can't help think what a waste of my mother's life that I spent it away from her - living a good, clean, healthy life with a lot of heartache - true

It is never easy to break from a controlling mother - and can you carry your medication around with you Outlander - can you leave it with the pharmacist and just have a sleeve at a time - I don't know what you are taking of course and how inconvenient it would be

Yeah - you mother has committed a crime - stealing your medication -

Enough for now - I will be thinking of you and although you are obviously not comfortable where you are now - you are safe for now

Dec

Good night @outlander, sleep well and peace be with you

@Eden1919 thank you i hope your ok

@Former-Member you can share you experiences here or somemwhere else an tag me that is fine- dont apologise for that im always interested in what others have to say

i havent really starteed talking about it today- i ahvent even meantioned the type it was except it was sexual abuse- she doesnt know the full extent of it though it is bringing up alot of memeories and its affecting me now- very greatly indeed

i know 😞 my mother and her bf are controlling everything and its making it so friggin hard. they pester me now about where i am, what im doing, who im with, have i got medications, what are those medications, yadda yadda yadda. god invasion of privacy much. i ahve lost my freedom and i dont know how to get it back

good night my beautiful @Former-Member sleep well

@Owlunar

ive lsot my freedom

how do i get it back now? im stuck, they question and try to control everything, where am i going your not going there, what do they want, yelling at health professionals over the phone over nothing and shoudnt be disclosed either.

i need something- i cant keep up with all this crap with nothing, my body and mind are already taking a huge toll and i cant do anymore than what im already doing. im not handling all this and even when im ot at home such as now- yes im safe but im not relaxed im on complete edge- its not really a way to live is it?

the medications im on so far are antibiotics- which i have to open the capsules as i cant take it whole so i ahve to empty the contents into something before i cna swallow it- so not really convenient with those but apparently according to them im allowed to have those hmm

then i ahve antihistamines- again not really the best to carry around

i cant beleive they did that!!! the took my freaking anti-nausea tablets!!! they threw friggin everything out!!!

i cant

this is so stupid it really is!

and i dont know how im going to handle this therapy i really dont if this is basic and if only you could see me in life form- you would probably strap me doen to a bed and tell to em friggin calm the heck down!

good night @Former-Member very good self care btw i hope you can have a good sleep and thank you so much for your help and support i really appreciate it lots of loe and hugs