when is it time for hospital

No! No! No! @outlander

Don't give up on your own life because of other people's selfishness - you are worth so much more than that - you are not a failure - life is just stacked against you in a most unfair way

So your mother has paid for her holiday - so now she had the kids and they are her kids and plans have fallen through and so SHE takes the time out and comes home and does HER job

Don't let other people wreck your life - tell your mother you are working toward your future and you need to study - you have already committed yourself to that - so why do you have to give up your investment for HER kids - sheesh - you're one of her kids too - what about your need for time and understanding?

I feel so angry with your mother - going ahead and making her plans without considering your plans - wow

That's great - you got me posting again

Dec

@Owlunar GREAT to hear from you. Missed you!!!!!!

@outlander Kick butt for the mother.... I'm angry too. Send her this way with HER kids.

I am hopping mad @outlander! When will your mother stop treating you like a servant?!

@outlander,been following the posts,your mother should allow for your work commitments,and asked what suited you.She should be now treating you like the young adult you are and have consideration for your commitments, especially after your hospital admissions.Everyone is right,she should have more consideration.

@outlander I have just had a quick read of what is happening for you.

You have had some very wise advise already and I want to re-iterate what everyone else has said.

It is time for you to talk to your mother. You may think that this is impossible in your present state but from what I can see you can't feel any worse. At the end ogf the day, no matter how much you want to care and protect for your sisters - it is NOT your responsibility. Your sisters are the responsibility of your mother and she needs to be able to organise an alternative arrangement that does not include you at the centre of it. I can already hear you saying 'BUT' - there are no buts here @outlander - YOU are NOT responsible.

As for the negativity you are feeling about yourself - you do this when you are overwhelmed and cannot think clearly. This is a perfect example of you needing to STOP - take yourself out of the situation (even for a few minutes), breath and turn your negative thinking around. When you are thinking clearly you can see the benefit and reward of working and studying. The only person that can stop you doing that is yourself. The only way you are going to be able to move forward is to continue to do the things that distract you from the negativity. You have made it very clear numerous times that you can cope much better when you are distracted with tangible activities - i.e working, drawing, nature etc. Therefore sitting with these feelings actually heightens the affect on you - so coping strategies/activities are essential otherwise you WILL stay in this mindset and there will be no chance of resolving this latest issue.

You do have the support of the community here but you also need to take some control over what is happening for you yourself. Take that breathe, think about what needs to be done and act calmly and constructively - and we will sit with you along the way

ive done what needed to be done. i couldnt sit with it any longer. the more i sat the worse i was getting.

it resulted in a massive argument between myself and my mother and she didnt like it but shes very very lucky. i was about to call an abulance and fully screw her plans becasue i was in such a state i went to the bathroom and had to SH. i know thats not ideal but in a way it did help me

and while this was going on i was talking to the support person and all i can say is god thank f**k for that
my support person is back on board she jsut explained to me that she had though since my hospital admissions she would have called it off but since i explained that she hasnt
she went holy s**t you cant do all that by yourself. shes abit angry at my mother herself as well.
she told me to dont dare call off work, she can make having the kids fro 2-3 hrs a day work. she will help me out.

why the f**k am i always the one who has to do all this crap seriously

@Zoe7@Former-Member@Sans911@Queenie@Maggie@Owlunar@KobeCat

im so drained, yet my anxiety is through the roof so now i guess its time to implement some strategies

It sounds like you are getting closer to steadying the ship @outlander If there are strategies that will allow you to sleep better tonight then you will be better placed for tomorrow.

@outlander,

I can relate,when I was your age I was caring for my two nieces who were babies with my mother because basically my sister was and still is a very selfish person who used to go from one dropkick boyfriend to another when her marriage to a someone who was a "conman" ended.At times she would emotionally blackmail us,if we didn't take them give them to their father.I used to have high arguments with my mother,at the time I was trying to study psychology,I gave that up .It wasn't my mother looking after the kids,it was mostly me from washing clothes ,bathing , putting to sleep.!My mother even then would sit on the couch most of the time.I wanted the mother to take them weekends,often she wouldn't.!My mother was irrational,and I could see the harm of the mother not taking responsibility and the fact that she used the crap out of us.She told me one day when I confronted her she didn't owe us nothing.I wanted nothing more to do with her.Last week as I said,she wanted Mum to do something for her and I refused .Mum wanted me to drive her somewhere as her car was having trouble for a deed for my sister.I saidc"no,",she hardly makes the effort with my mother.I heard my mother say she was having car trouble on the phone,she still pushed her knowing I was here to take her.It caused another argument between my mother and I but I stood my ground as I heard the lack of consideration and respect,and knew it.

I was so frustrated at that situation when I was your age,and that's what you have:a lot of frustration because you know "it's not right".Can't chastise you on Sh because I eat to punish and comfort myself.

The sad thing is probably,your mother will never change,but you can and you have to be aware that things may get worse when they marry as it changes family dynamics. That's why you can't give up your dreams,and tonight confronting your mother you showed that.She should know you need support and have consideration for your life and whatever you are doing in your life.💞