when is it time for hospital

@outlander,just try and calm yourself whether it's buying or having a wheat bag to place on your back etc.
Thanks @Sans911@@ ,not feeling too positive,all I want to do is sleep and blood pressure is affecting me from getting stressed yesterday.Ive had a few breakdowns ,I question like everyone else how long. I can keep going when the signs are telling me to quit.My cats are the only thing that keep me going and I feel like I let them down.Goodnight💞

Ignore behaviours that you know are inappropriate in anyone you know @outlander .... anyone.

I know you are nervous about it, and it won't be easy, but you will begin to find your personal power ... and it's not found in pushing back .... it's in holding your boundaries and your dignity, no matter how undignified others around you might behave.

You will work out how to do that as you start to think about it .... changing little things, bit by bit in baby steps. It won't be easy and it will take quite some time because it won't be easy, but your courage will grow as you begin to see the affect of gently but very firmly holding your ground.

And we will be here to whinge to as you go along .... ❣️

@Faith-and-Hope has given you some really good advice @outlander. At the moment, you are in much more than a sister role. You're a pseudo mother to your them. They need to respect you and your needs as well as their own.

You will be doing both yourself and them a service if you instil those boundaries.

How do you get out of it @Sans911 I feel like I just keep going backwards. Until now ive never been in a psych ward at all until 4 months ago and now ive been in there twice and twice for injuries. I want there to be a day when I can look back and say holy crap I got throught that!
They say this is called character building! Good grief what character people are trying to create me except for destroyed or defeated.

I dont know who I am anymore. I use to think I could ride horses and retrain them as people would come to me for their troubled horses even though I was only 13, they would come to me and most times id be able to fix the problem, give lessons and watch people grow with their horses.
Someone who minimal problems despite bullies, being overweight and still being anxious. Ive always been an anxious child but I never use to control me just a little more more anxious then what I 'normal' person would be but I was easily reassured. Not any more. I have no idea who I am,

My self esteem is though the floor and have no confidence what so ever and doubt myself so much.

Yeah I guess, it cant really get too much worse in my relationships with people so to better them by implemementing things probably wont make much difference. I dont know why I fear it so much, but its a massive trigger for me for some unknown reason.