when is it time for hospital

Hi @outlander

You are battling with a lot of abuse from the adults - so called adults - in your house which can hardly be a home for you - I understand anxiety enough to know that scary stuff just happens - and it is not caused by you - but you are in the way of all the what you call shite - cripes - it is impossible for you to cause all of that

I think I read that your sister has gastro - and you feel sure you are next in line. Having so much stress lowers the immune system - and - A HUGE AND

YOU NEED PRIVACY - at your age you need a room to yourself and a space to keep your private and precious things safe without fear of interference. Of course you know this and it is easy to say - hard to get

I remember that man in your house said you had it pretty good there - believe me - you do not. You are a kind and sensitiver person who likes the place where you live clean and tidy and you are being taking advantage of - and how to get out - um - you have to prepare for that and to get a place of your own you need a bond and first months rent

But you are looking at your future - nursing is a good option - I think you would be a good nurse - no - a great nurse because you are so sensitive and understanding

Don't worry about my thread - I know you are reading it - it's for more adult issues

Dec

@Owlunar

i dont understand why they only pick on me. its quite sad really, the one they need but yet abuse and dont give a shite about. im coming to chill with you for abit hope thats ok. peace and quite and someone understanding would be great.

yeah my sister has gastro, its going around so ive been told. i always have a funny tummy it just gets alot worse if i get gastro. it like the bug doubles in sizr when it gets to me. im a very easy target for an illness at all which really sucks.

i would give anything to have my own room, my own privacy and a space to call my own.

yes i was told- i have an easy life i create all the drama in it- that i overeggerate things.

that got to me becasue i realised how oblivious they were to how sick i was yet they said their words ' we watched you get worse' if they seen that why didnt they help me? if they ahve the answers to everything why didnt they stop and help me rather than planning their holiday or bossing me around or telling me to grow up?

i dont know if i want to do nursing though. im not sure i could handle it well nor all those needles! omg

one of my triggers is seeing people sick or being around me. i can study a few cheap online courses that are tasters for nursing so i might do those first

Hi @outlander

I can hang here for a bit with you - I am going to get my hair cut in a couple of hours but free until then

I just saw an interesting programme on Dr. Phil. The thing about where you are right now - really appropriate

The problems in the house where you live are not Outlander Problems - they are family problems and I know from my own experience your mother and her lover are not going to want to see that they are causing your so much stress you are failing physically and emotionally - and part of the problem is that man - really - becasuse I would never - NEVER - let any man except their father have "a talk: with my children.

Your mother needs to get her act together

I'll leave it here for now and you can post back if you want to chat about this

You are not causing all the drama though - you are reacting to emotional abuse

I care and I know

Dec

thanks @Owlunar

they dont see anything. i am invisible and if i casue an up roar it works out worse for me then staying quiet so thats what im doing.

there has been one change since my what to call it meltdown and that while i still watch the kids alot its abit more accomdating and dont have to watch them every second of everyday.

i jsut dont know anymore. im defeated by life

Yeah - I know - and it really sucks

So you don't have to watch the kids so much - I don't have to wonder why but I could tell you

Maybe - I could be wrong - but if you meltdown caring for the kids that would be pretty bad - it's a sort of concession but not enough

Yeah - they use you and treat you like some kind of slave and get pissed when you challenge them and called it over-exaggerating - and it's not at all fair

But what to do? What to do?

Dec

@Owlunar its so hard. why is life so friggin hard.

im powerless to do anything about it until they either move out, i move out or go back to hospital. i cant keep being admitted becasue its my family sending me there- as sad it sounds but they are greatly contributing all this and making things worse

Yeah - I get it @outlander

The way your family is treating you is wearing you down and right now how can you move out?

Going back to hospital because things didn't change and your mother didn't continue with family therapy is a reasonable concept to me. When you got out before you said you never wanted to go downhill like that again.

Only you know how desperate you are feeling and whether you need to go back to hospital - but yeah - think about it - the way you are being treated is abusive

How long before your mother and that man get their act together and move out with the kids? Do you have any idea? Do they have any idea about it?

Dec

@Owlunar its bloody frustrating.

im already headed backwrds and to the point of hospitalisation. the only thing that needs to come back is thoughts on S. and that im not letting happen again. life just seems to be winning at the moment.

i dont have a clue when they are lanning to move out and they dont either. they are waiting on a housing list but occasionally applying for private housing.

i feel bad @Owlunar im talking to you about my issues but i cant think of anything to say about yours. and you have your own dramas at the moment. im hoping im not making things worse