Safety

@STORMGRL101 thank you that means a lot

also thankyou @Zoe7

@Eden1919 I read both part one and part two. I hear you.

thanks @Phoenix_Rising

i dont know what to do anymore i want to scream it all hurts.

Can you scream into your pillow @Eden1919 how is your dog and bunny?

@STORMGRL101 maybe i could do that. dog is good and bunny is having a run around and playing

I dont feel good

Part 3

I do not feel right inside and everything feels weird and distant and cold and strange and there is soo soo soo much going on right now and i cant even begin i am so scared that the doctors will find out i dont trust them at all. they do more harm to me than good and they lie to me i am not sick but they say i am why does this keep happening i cant sleep but i need to i want to but i cant they wont let me sleep constantly threatening me keeping me up with them i feel like i am going to cry and the worst part is that no matter what i do none of this will ever change because i was picked for this i dont know why but i was and i would rather not have been but i guess there is a reason somewhere i just havent found it yet. i dont know what to do everything is still swirling faster and faster round and round i feel totally alone everything around me is caving in and i cant stop it. my head is a mess and yet i need it to get out of another mess why did i tell her i want a take back but i cant get one ahh i cant do this they are going to hurt me i know it and i cant seem to stop it it literally haunts my dreams and my day dreams and nothing makes it go away. how do i accept something like that and the knowing is hard knowing that they will fight as hard as i will to destroy me completely but no matter how loud i scream nobody will hear me no matter how much it will hurt me they will not stop i am doomed completely doomed and nobody seems to care at all (i dont mean people from here) i just i cant do this i cant it hurts too much i have to go it is the only way the only escape left if i stay they will hurt me forever and keep me locked away in a world of darkness forever i cant have that the only way to make it stop is to end it all i dont see another way out anymore ugh i want to scream the things inside me are screaming and it hurts so badly i cant even explain it. i am lost

i cant keep doing this

@lola I will try the catt team maybe instead but not 000 they scare me.