Safety

@NikNik I am just very tired and airing my feelings. I just need to make it through the next week that is all ugh what am i even saying all i want to do right now is cry.

@Eden1919 I am not the best company at the moment so I am really pleased to see that you are in great hands with @NikNik. I am thinking of you though and will try and catch up with everything that has happened from your appointment today when I am able to.

Minute by minute, hour by hour and day by day buddy

hey @Zoe7 and @NikNik I have been pacing around my house for the last hour because i cant settle I feel really awful and i am really scared and I am getting convinced of something bad and it is hard to explain and I really really really feel bad I dont know what to do I cant make it all stop and i want to scream i am trying so hard but i cant take this much longer I really dont know what to do anymore I am really scared.

Hi @Eden1919

I have just sent you a copy of your safety plan.

The strategies and distractions may seem like they won't work, but it seems like even the smallest distraction might bring you a moment of relief.

Another option would be to contact your case worker. You mentioned they encouraged you to call them whenever you need to.

What do you think?

Nik

I cant call my caseworker out of hours she said if i needed to to call the crisis team but they are supposed to be for emergencies I feel like they would just be annoyed if i called.

@NikNik but what if they wanted to see me i couldnt do that ugh this is too much of a mess

That's okay @Eden1919
Your suggestions via email are a great suggestions!

@Eden1919 I don't have much for you tonight but I can share a little of what I am feeling in the hope that you get I understand a little of what you are going through at the moment.

I feel totally alone and in a world of complete darkness. I cannot see any light to guide me anywhere - so I am stuck in a place that I don't want to be in. I am afraid of how I am feeling and that it has been this way for too long. I am so tired that I do not have the energy to fight through this constantly. I was angry - but now those feelings have dissipated into numbness. I do not want to feel anymore because it is too overwhelming and destruvtive. I do not want to tell anyone how bad this is as I also do not want to take up anyone's time or resources with my own struggles. I feel like I should be able to move through this and move on but the intensity and ongoing fears are all consuming. I hate my life, I hate my past, I hate even being alive. ...but I am alive and while that continues I have to hold on to some hope that I will be able to see the light again soon.

Strength, courage and belief are three little words that can hold us together and keep us going - some days they are written very faintly in our lives (almost unseen) and others they are a beacon of hope for a better tomorrow. Hold these three little words close @Eden1919 and I will walk this path with you the best I can