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Social anxiety and panic attacks

IntrinsicCasual Contributor03 Mar 2026, 1:37 am AEDT

Social anxiety and panic attacks

Hi everyone,

I.am so grateful.to have found this group/forum, I am.struggling with feeling very alone and currently in a very dark place mentally.

I have been out of work the last few months so unfortunately this has given me more time to overthink, analyse, magnify and read into everything more

often than usual.

I have convinced myself that I am unwanted, not loved, hated, I feel like everyone is talking about me behind my back, I feel paranoid, highly.

misunderstood, judged, unwelcome and

my depression is at an all time high.

I just want to.share this with like minded people and not feel so incredibly low and alone all of the time.I have so much trouble sleeping, concentrating, focusing, being present, I am overly.emotional and sensitive all the time and I am constantly thinking about who I can blame for me being this way, I look back on my childhood and I have many people i could blame, even people I love and care about deeply. I am married , I have been with my husband almost 20 years and he is like a human calming force for me, he may not understand me completely but he grounds me, calms me and makes me feel loved, wanted, accepted, valuable, heard and seen.

Unfortunately where i live iis isolated, very far from family and friends, therefore I lost contact with close friends and only have contact through social media and phone calls. I honestly feel like I dont know who I am anymore, I look into the mirror and see a very sad, lonely misunderstood stranger. I do have a psychologist for therapy but unfortunately it does not feel like its helping and I did give it a chance for over two years, I cannot afford anyone else so that sadly is not an option at this point.

I would love to connect with others and even try helping others too.

A little background on me is that I am highly spiritual (not religious) so I have strong faith and belief in life after death, reincarnation, angels, ghosts, karma interacting with souls that are departed etc I respect all religions and would never force my belief system onto anyone.

I am an early childhood educator. I find that children, these little humans are rhe most authentic souls walking this Earth and they are filled with integrity, I know they do lie but never with any malicious intent. I am currently not working, I miss ths children with all my heart. Unfortunately since Covid its never been the same, im sure many here can relateI

I love music amd feel.it on a cellular level, right through to my core, it is like therapy for me. I am a huge movie buff, I especially love true crime shows and trying to solve the problems and guess who done it. I am also into psychological thrillers.

I have a close knit fanily and in-laws.

I am.highly intuitive, most people think im the real deal psychic, mostly because i have predicted countless future events and been very accurate in reading a person, I was told I should do psychic readings as a job but I dont want to.take money from people amd I would be too scared to make a mistake and ruin lives, I would prefer to keep it as a gift, although it can feel like a curse knowing horrible things about people's loved ones and not being able to give this information to people, my gut always tells me when I should intervene and when I shouldn't, I believe in fate very much and some things ate meant to be, even the most cruel.and unjust.

I love sleeping and I love eating 😋. I am very good at diffusing conflict. I have been called a vault for peoples secrets, anything anyone has confided in me will be taken to my grave.

I am extremely protective, loyal, gentle soul, compassionate, an empath and I can read people and sense who they truly are, I never call someone out in front of other's but I do warn anyone I care about to be careful of this individual.

The beach is my solace, I feel that I thrive mostly around any body of water, I find the ocean to be magical, there is no other place I would prefer to live out the rest of my days. I have chronic pain but I try not to let it rule my life, not easy sadly.

Ok enough avout me, if anyone has any questions I am an open book. I look forward to.forming connections, I am highly introverted, guarded, cautious, paranoid, protective, extremely private and the only reason I mention this is because I want be answering any personal questions that can disclose any of my private information. It is a pleasure joining this group amd I.truly look forward to having discussions with you all. Thank you for reading, please take care and be safe always. 🙏

41 replies

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In response to: Social anxiety and panic attacks

AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor06 Mar 2026, 8:36 pm AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@Mustang67 thank you for the tag! 🥰😁

@Intrinsic i have read your first post. I think i'd really enjoy getting to know you! 😊 but i will say that right know i dont have much capacity for the forums, but i am hoping that will change soon when life quietens down a bit again (it had better! Lol). And so i'd really love the opportunity to get to know you when i can 🥰. You sound a really interesting and authentic person and i just love that in a person!

Of course if you dont "click" with me, that is also totally OK! 😅. I can be a bit.... different?

But i love talking about peoples MH, why they think certain ways (you mentioned you question why you are how you are, for example), helping people, and asking questions that people are never obliged to answer! 😘

Sometimes i can be direct - but always in love and curiosity. But i try not to be too tired in difficult questions until i know someone quite well 🥰 and they know where i'm coming from!

I am definitely not neurotypical lol.

In response to: Social anxiety and panic attacks

DownMoreThanUpSenior Contributor09 Mar 2026, 5:41 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@Mustang67 Thank you. Feeling better today.

@Intrinsic @AlwaysMyself @Rosepetal96 @MissGremlin @heartathome @ENKELI

i was thinking of a poem i once wrote while still overcome by my fears so often. As in suffering a full on panic/paranoia attack in my paranoid alter.

i will see if i can find the poem back. Wrote it a long time ago. See if anyone relates.

Fear Holds Fast,
Fear grabs hold with hot iron grip
evil thoughts quick confusion sowing
birthing me terrorising conditions
harvesting my own faithless heart.

All my doubts and unbelief's peaking.
Hopes and dreams torching the flames!
Daily goals a catastrophe unfolding!
Earthquakes shattering my defences.

Feeling that loveless grip ramming.
Cruel enemies rejoice an easy victory!
Advancing through my broken gates.
with me watching the fires burning!

i am a mess inside my dwelling place.
Terrors cast hair raising shadows.
My fears fuelling every insecurity.
Shamefully exposing weakness.

Paranoid voice good life plundering.
Scorching torches lie only darkness.
Roasting me freaking myself as dinner.
My life serving the wicked feasting.

My friends, My friends do i thirst!
For i forsook my own loving truth.
Believing those lies hurting me badly.
Will i ever learn seeing self only true?

When we harbour fear within how can we the battle win?

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Mustang67Senior Contributor12 Mar 2026, 8:31 pm AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@DownMoreThanUp wrote:
@Mustang67 Thank you. Feeling better today.

@Intrinsic @AlwaysMyself @Rosepetal96 @MissGremlin @heartathome @ENKELI
i was thinking of a poem i once wrote while still overcome by my fears so often. As in suffering a full on panic/paranoia attack in my paranoid alter.

i will see if i can find the poem back. Wrote it a long time ago. See if anyone relates.

Fear Holds Fast,
Fear grabs hold with hot iron grip
evil thoughts quick confusion sowing
birthing me terrorising conditions
harvesting my own faithless heart.
All my doubts and unbelief's peaking.
Hopes and dreams torching the flames!
Daily goals a catastrophe unfolding!
Earthquakes shattering my defences.
Feeling that loveless grip ramming.
Cruel enemies rejoice an easy victory!
Advancing through my broken gates.
with me watching the fires burning!
i am a mess inside my dwelling place.
Terrors cast hair raising shadows.
My fears fuelling every insecurity.
Shamefully exposing weakness.
Paranoid voice good life plundering.
Scorching torches lie only darkness.
Roasting me freaking myself as dinner.
My life serving the wicked feasting.
My friends, My friends do i thirst!
For i forsook my own loving truth.
Believing those lies hurting me badly.
Will i ever learn seeing self only true?
When we harbour fear within how can we the battle win?

@DownMoreThanUp I can certainly relate to some of that. Thank you so much for sharing ❤️

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

DownMoreThanUpSenior Contributor17 Mar 2026, 8:51 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@Mustang67 @Intrinsic @AlwaysMyself @Rosepetal96 @MissGremlin

How much has our own self image to do with our anxious feelings?
What is it about social anxiety that troubles you the most?
Big groups of people how do they make you feel uncomfortable?
How do you deal with panic attacks in public?

My responses;

i found that my own self image, as well as inner insecurities/panic attacks of past social interactions play a great role how i relate publicly to others. Also being an empath makes social interactions tiring and confusing.
The fact that people are not honest about what they feel and think is hardest for me. For when i do not know truth from lie my feelings can become very confusing an empath.
Big groups of people make me feel surrounded, threatened and overwhelmed for there are far many (wrong) vibes around.
Panic attacks in public demand i hide away. Public toilets i do not like hiding in, rather empty places or hidden out of sight spaces

i learned that my fear lies when i speculate about others.

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

DownMoreThanUpSenior Contributor18 Mar 2026, 11:29 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@Intrinsic @Mustang67 @AlwaysMyself @Rosepetal96 @MissGremlin @heartathome @Shaz51 @tyme

Luckily after fear has been mastered the storms in life begin to die down as well. Anyone relate to this state of being after a really bad anxiety attack and the calm returns?

It is quiet now!

not the silence of fear—

not the silence of hiding—

just… quiet

the air no longer trembles

no voices pressing in from all sides

no hands pulling at thought or breath

just space

something inside loosens

a grip I thought was part of me

is simply… gone

I wait for it—

the surge, the noise,

the command to bend again—

nothing comes

only breath

steady… slow

I can hear it now

my own voice

not forced, not shaped,

not echoing another—

mine

the ground feels different

not shifting, not cracking beneath me

but holding—quietly, without demand

I stand on it

unsure at first

then still

there is a light here—

not blinding, not burning,

not something to fear—

just clear

it does not shout

it does not accuse

it shows

what is, as it is

and I see—

nothing is chasing me now

no shadow stretching behind thought

no edge pressing at my back

I turn

and nothing follows

(nothing needs to)

something like warmth

begins to return

not taken, not forced—

allowed

I feel it in small things

in breath

in stillness

in simply being here

the need to run fades

the need to hide softens

the need to fight dissolves

I remain

and that is enough

time moves differently now

not hunted, not consumed—

open

there is room to choose

room to move without fear

room to be without becoming

something I am not

I am still here

not broken

not owned

here

and in this quiet space—

something new

begins

time

moving on.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xtRswC23y8

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Mustang67Senior Contributor20 Mar 2026, 8:21 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Beautiful words @DownMoreThanUp and I can relate to it.

I love the song too. Very appropriate.

In response to: Social anxiety and panic attacks

IntrinsicCasual Contributor22 Mar 2026, 1:43 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Thank you so much for your reply Mustang67. I truly and deeply value your insight and empathy, I really do sense you have such an authentic aura and soul, your reply gave me immense comfort and that is not easy for others to do with me, i am extremely guarded but when I sense truth in another being, I feel it with my entire soul, so thank you for your words and taking the time to read my post, for tagging others to also bring me comfort, you are a beautiful person and I truly look forward to getting to know you and many other enlightening souls that are travelling on similar paths and journey's. Thank you so very much. Take care now 💖

In response to: Social anxiety and panic attacks

IntrinsicCasual Contributor22 Mar 2026, 1:52 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Thank you so much for your reply Rosepetal96. I found your words truly touching and I can sense you truly do understand this difficult journey, I look forward to getting to know you amd everything you wrote about the changes in early childhood education resonate with me profoundly. Also with my chronic pain, I too feel like this is the new "me" unfortunately it seems after 10 years since my surgeries, I am yet to understand who the new me is and I can feel those around me are completely confused, hence the feelings of feeling so alone and misunderstood, but with this forum and beautiful souls like yourself, I am starting to see that I am not alone and there are others walking this journey along with me, even without ever meeting, it is a blessing to have read your reply, so I thank you so very much, take care now 💖

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

IntrinsicCasual Contributor22 Mar 2026, 2:05 am AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

Thank you so much for your reply AlwaysMyself, I appreciate how raw and honest you are, I definitely click with people that have that kind of authenticity so incredibly rare to come across on this realm. I am a very sensitive person but I love honesty and I truly look forward to getting to know you. I find "different" to be intriguing and I often learn so much more from people that are their true core self, I admire that in you. Your reply made me feel heard and I appreciate you taking the time to read my post and for making me feel welcome, I thank you so very much, take care now 💖

In response to: Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

DownMoreThanUpSenior Contributor22 Mar 2026, 1:44 pm AEDT

Re: Social anxiety and panic attacks

@Intrinsic @Mustang67 @AlwaysMyself @Rosepetal96 @MissGremlin

Feeling very anxious again today. Crappy feeling!

Fear Wont Let Go

Fear holds me fast with tightening chain,
No sudden blow, but strain;
I rise to stand, I brace again,
Yet lose the ground I gain.

I school my thoughts to steady still,
I bend my mind to true;
For fleeting breaths it seems to hold,
Then breaks as all I do.

I mark the ground I call my own,
Set stone on stone with care;
Yet shifts beneath what I have laid,
And leaves me standing bare.

Each fall cuts deeper than the last,
Each loss more sharply known;
What once required my fullest strength
Now breaks what I have grown.

I know this path too well to trust,
The rise, the fall, the same;
No lack of sight, no lack of will,
Yet always end in shame.

My hands rebuild what will not stand,
My thoughts like sand still slip;
What truth I reach to hold as firm
Runs through my failing grip.

My friends, my friends—I thirst in this,
Not from the lack, but strain;
For all I reach for something firm
Returns me here again.

My friends, my friends—how long must I
Still see, yet not break through?
To know the ground on which to stand,
Yet fail to hold it true.

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