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Cuddlebears Space

Cuddlebears Space

Hello everyone I’ve made a space here.

I’ve been having a really rough time. I have experienced a lot of trauma and abuse since childhood. I’ve been on forums for a while now and thought to start a thread so that my journey and anyone that cares to see how I’m going and offer support or advice can find me here.

I have complex ptsd, anxiety and severe depression with anhedonia. I’m currently tapering antidepressant and it’s been brutal.

I am really struggling everyday and can’t find ways to feel better. I’ve tried so many things.

I am having daily panic attacks, my body shutdown and I am so lonely with very little support. There’s a real heavy darkness around me I feel so unloved and worthless. I can’t do basic things like shower, eat, clean and going out is very very hard. I have no purpose or meaning though I try to create it but nothing works.

More recently I’ve experienced passive SI and sometimes more active. The tapering I believe has caused these symptoms. I’m safe.

Im finding it hard to write this all up. I hope it gives you some insight. @MissGremlin @AlwaysMyself@Chasingsunsets

266 replies

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In response to: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@Till23 Hello lovely. How are you? I really hope you are safe from any fires as I know you are in a regional area.

Im hoping there’s packing is going well and you can return home safely. 🙂

Thank you for checking in.

In response to: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@ENKELI Hello my friend. How are you? It’s so good to see you back on the forums.

What have you been upto?

It is tough and like you I really don’t have supportive people. This taper has been horrific too. I’ve been unable to even keep up in the forums which I’m hoping I can try to catch up on.

I’m in Victoria. 🙂

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

Hey @Cuddlebear

I am back now.

I’m sorry to hear that things are still not good for you.
I know I should be used to it by now (just from general MH services) but I’m just astounded at the lack of formal supports that you currently have.

I am glad you were able to get on to the forums to read all the supportive messages on your thread though.

I hope it has at least some impact on you.

I know It’s not the same as having wrap around support for tapering from your meds, your underlying MH issues, not to mention your physical health issues.

Do you like sports like cricket or tennis?

There has been/is a fair bit on TV recently/currently which may be a distraction if you are interested in them.

Have you been able to get some of your medication compounded so you can taper more slowly?

I hope you have air conditioning where you are with these hot days recently.

Tomorrow is supposed to be the hottest day here, I think you had your hottest day today. It’s annoying for me as I do use exercise to help with my MH.

For me here, there’s less risk of bushfires now that we had the nearby one earlier in summer.

I hope Wilbur is helping you.

Is it true you also have cats and a parrot? I thought I read that somewhere

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@Cuddlebear I wish I could take even half the pain from you my friend. Tapering doesn't sound fun at all and without a good support system it's so much bigger to have to cope with.

I have not been doing much at all since Christmas. My GP retired at the end of the year so now I have to find another one that is as good as he was. I'd been seeing him for 20 years. I just hope I find a new one soon.

I am going out with the girl members of my family for lunch tomorrow. Between mum, 2 of my cousins and me we all have birthdays within the first 10 days of January so it's easier to just catch up all together. I don't know whether I am looking forward to it really, I am never comfortable with the hot flushes and sweats these days so unless it's below 30 degrees I am always hot and sticky. Menopause sucks.

One day at a time sweetheart, the fact that you've been able to get on the forums with everything going on is a huge win in my eyes. Remember to keep being kind to yourself and your friends here in your space are all thinking of you, praying or sending positive thoughts your way.

I also hope the weather isn't too horrid in your part of Vic xoxo 🫂

In response to: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@NightFury Hello lovely how are you? Thank you for sitting with me.

it’s been terribly difficult. 😞

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@ENKELI Hello my friend. How are you?

Wow 20 years with the GP. I hope you can find a good one nearby really soon. Sometimes there’s reviews you can read to get an idea of how they might be. Maybe the clinic you went to has another good Gp?

I didn’t realise you were in menopause. I’m now post menopause. I totally understand how the symptoms really make it hard especially feeling hot. I’m hoping it’s not hot for you today and you can enjoy your girls lunch.

Im trying one day at a time. It’s so difficult. It’s one thing after another. I’m glad I have you and others here. I’d be totally lost without the forum.

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

Hi @Cuddlebear I hear you, my friend. I'm having a bit of a down day. Just not feeling fantastic.

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

Hugs ❤️ @Cuddlebear 🥰

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

@NightFury Hello my friend. How are you feeling today? I really hope it’s a better day for you compared to yesterday.

In response to: Re: Cuddlebears Space

Re: Cuddlebears Space

Hi @Cuddlebear how are you doing?

I'm having a PJ day. I'm allowing myself rest and relaxation. I am still a little unwell and feeling a little down, so I'm resting and hoping that it helps towards feeling better tomorrow.

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