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Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor12 Sept 2025, 4:22 pm AEST

Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

I have multiple mental illnesses including Bipolar 2, cptsd, OCD, social anxiety. I’m also neurodivergent, ADHD and ASD. I already have tons of labels and a lot going on. I’m getting assessed for an ED on Monday during my psych appointment, I reckon I meet criteria so I am anticipating another diagnosis. I know it explains my how I’ve been feeling but it’s another label, I hate feeling so broken and feeling like I’m complicated. I know my disordered eating habits are adversely affecting my mental and physical health, I’ve just been in denial for so long and would also get defensive when people commented on my eating habits or asked about them.

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In response to: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor02 Feb 2026, 8:51 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

That is absolutely progress @creative_writer !! 😍

I think I am in some ways lucky that my "ruminations" are different to what I imagine most people have, from what I read/hear from others. For me, the only rumination i get tends to be SI. If I have thoughts around other things - I can usually self-talk myself out of the hole pretty easy (over 20 years of practice I guess). I challenge the thoughts I am having and see if I can see it from any other possible perspective. And if I am not sure / worried about something -- I ask people I trust to be objective. 🙂 I tend to confront things head-on, but I'm super-lucky because I don't have anxiety. I'm sure it would be a lot harder for me if I had anxiety!!

Would you like to share what thoughts/ruminations are going on for you? Maybe I can help provide some helpful "challenges" to them, or help guide thinking around alternative perspectives?

I think I'll be online for another 1 hour.

Don't have to want to - just an offer, based on what has helped me in the past. 😊

These days, for me, getting out of my mental rut, I have 2 methods.

1. Talk to someone - just letting someone know (venting) how I feel seems to help me somehow -- as long as they listen openly and don't judge me. I don't mind them offering alternative perspectives, as long as they understand/accept if I explain why I don't think/feel its the right "fit" (i.e. if I don't think it is. Sometimes it is the right fit - and that is also helpful!)

2. I look for a distraction. And this can be so hard. And sometimes it doesn't work. Like tonight, I could feel my mood start to decline and my thoughts starting to go there too. So I came online to read replies on a few threads, then I ran out of those (because I'm on my laptop, but not using my emails backlog - only the notifications icon, so it doesnt have the ones from days ago still). So then I thought "what helps me?" - Helping others with similar thoughts. So I went to the SI/SH space to see if there were any new threads that I could offer support on. And then, I got the tag from you! So somehow you had excellent timing - because it's just what I needed!! 😁

In response to: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor02 Feb 2026, 9:42 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

@AuntGlow I might go on the thread once I feel up to it. I would need time to think about my intention.

My pdoc and psych want me to go slowly. I’m exploring the option of going to another therapist for EMDR. I’ve left a message, I might also try calling them up again tomorrow morning, I’ve just been going through profiles today.

I think the meds to the edge off the depression a bit, so it’s been easier to think more clearly. I think I really needed the meds because the risk was getting a bit too high. I had one really bad day, I spoke to my psychiatrist the day after. I think he was concerned, and he was able to add a meds. I might need to talk about it more with one of my supports since it’s still weighing on me. It left me a bit shook.

I’ve heard about shaking. I feel like there was a somatic therapy that incorporated shaking but I don’t remember what it’s called anymore. I heard about it from someone. I think kids naturally shake when they’re stressed, movement can help.

@AlwaysMyself self talk definitely does take years. It is true I have a lot of anxiety.

It can help to talk to others because they do often have other perspectives. I know they are different ways to see things. Sometimes it also confuses me because I have all these opposing beliefs about myself. I could hold the belief “this is my fault” and also hold “this isn’t my fault”. I know the later is more rational, but emotionally I feel the first one. Maybe I have a lot left to process still, but I can do that when the timing is right.

Distraction can be more effective during certain moments. I feel like it’s more challenging when things are more rough. I was out yesterday, but my mind was preoccupied. I guess it was better to be mildly distracted than not. The environment probably wasn’t the best for me at the moment. Sensory overload can feel more intense when mental health challenges are more intense. Maybe it’s also about finding a suitable distraction and being more realistic. Helping others can be super rewarding, but I find that I need to pace myself. I volunteer for short periods (up to two hours) of time on a crisis line. I’m able to manage short periods with long rests in between. It’s super important to pace oneself too when helping others.

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor02 Feb 2026, 9:48 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

@creative_writer That sounds a really good reflection. 😊. And pacing yourself is absolutely really important - and knowing where different things will help and when they will overwhelm. 😊. And whilst helping other may help me with distraction, I know its not the case for most people!

I have to go for now - TV time (tradition) with my mum!

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor03 Feb 2026, 8:19 am AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

@AlwaysMyself helping others can be distracting but also triggering for me. I do think everyone has triggers regardless of whether they struggle with their mental health. Maybe with where I’m at I just feel more vulnerable, though I do still plan to work in mental health at a later stage. I wanted to do some healing before I go there.

I hope you were able to wind down by watching TV last night. What did you watch?

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

AlwaysMyselfSenior Contributor03 Feb 2026, 1:49 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

Working on finding your balance, healing, and decreasing triggers sounds a healthy idea @creative_writer 😊. Wanting to help others with MH too shows you are caring - and it is totally OK to not be in a place where you feel able to do that currently. I have those times too. 😊

We watch Planet America together. Although i do prefer the podcast because it goes into more depth of topics, and isnt poking fun (although sometimes that *can* be funny too, when really silly things have been said in the media 😅). I dont find politics stressful as im not emotionally involved with it -- esp even more so when it is not australian politics. I've only watched it during certain presidencies and leading up to elections as a way of understanding how their system works. Its so different to our election system!

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor03 Feb 2026, 5:41 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

@AlwaysMyselfI currently just volunteer up to two hours because that’s where I am at right now. I think it’s lovely to watch TV with other family members. I often watch Tv with my mum and sister.

TW: death

I was watching TV today and one of the characters died. I had to come face to face with my own grief. I naturally avoid thinking about painful events, until I’m forced to. I avoid and distance myself. I don’t want to think about granny’s death. She left the world in September. She lived a long life, but it’s still hard

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor03 Feb 2026, 8:52 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

I want to stop thinking. How do I stop thinking?

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

JynxModerator03 Feb 2026, 9:12 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

Heya @creative_writer been a smidge since I've checked in - I think I got your thread open in another tab somewhere to go back to 😅

Hear things are a bit rough tonight, and I totally feel you with how difficult it can be when we've got racing/relentless thoughts.

I know that coming back into your body can be a bit rough for you, but focusing on some gentle movement and some stretches might help? I find when my brain is Very Loud, stuff like just watching tv as a distraction isn't always enough. Sometimes video games can work in this case, because of having to focus! Also writing out the thoughts to get them out of your brain, does wonders for me, especially if the thoughts are repetitive. Chatting to a support line can also help with that externalising and processing.

Deep breaths hun, you got this 💜

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

creative_writerSenior Contributor03 Feb 2026, 9:29 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

@Jynx maybe I’m trying too hard to not feel pain, you can’t run away from grief forever. My natural instinct is to run away from pain, but it eventually comes to your door one day. I’ve done that with other traumas in the past. It worked for a bit and then it didn’t. The thoughts eventually became super repetitive and intense. It would become harder to escape. I try hard not to think, but I end up thinking a lot.

In my mind I’m not sure if I’ve really processed granny being gone, maybe being overseas creates a distance.

I’ve been reaching out to helplines when needed, I did tonight, I think I accidentally closed my tab, oops, but I had to get going because I had to take my night meds. I’m going to try to get to bed in an hour

In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

JynxModerator03 Feb 2026, 10:40 pm AEDT

Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

For sure @creative_writer but we can wait for times when we feel more stability or feel supported enough to truly allow ourselves to sit in that grief. Sometimes we do have to carve out that time, when we can, cos you're right - running can be a temporary solution, but can make things a lot harder when it all catches up to us.

Makes sense when there's physical distance! Do you have any keepsakes or symbols of her that you can hold close? Or you could write her a letter, telling her the things you wish you could say.

Very glad to hear you're reaching out as needed, and I hope you're off to bed and slumberland a-ok hun. Hugs!

(づ ᴗ _ᴗ)づ♡

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