Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)

Oops I missed your post-walk post from a few days ago!!!

3 kitties on walk 😍.
Oh, I was known as a child for wanting to 'annoy' my family cat when it was "too peaceful" 🤣 - I just felt like giving it a tummy rub or something when it was sleeping. I don't know if this is a common urge? Or perhaps was some form of my inner child trying to communicate that it didn't feel OK because it didn't feel at peace too??

Our cat had no problem digging its claws and teeth in if it was either playful or upset lol - but that was OK with me, I knew that was part of the parcel if I played games using my hands (instead of a toy!) or gave it a tummy rub. 😅

Ack, it sounds like the past few days and especially last night weren't good for you. Please know you are always welcome to tag me. If I am online/available I will respond 😊, and if I am not, then I will come by and respond when i can - unless i somehow miss it like i did the other day, in which case keep tagging me and feel free to make a joke about how I might need my forum-eyes checked if I miss it more than once! 😂

How are things sitting for you this morning?

I am doing OK today. A bit sleepy and tired, because I did not sleep well last night (even after I finally went to bed!). But I put my washing on when I got out of bed and it has just finished now, so I shall go hang it out. Expecting my dog walker to arrive any time now also though - so should be place friendly jokes about whether i get part-way through, then hand my dogs to the walker and forget about the rest of the wet laundry by accident?? 🤣 There's a very realistic chance of this happening. (But I reckon this is still a "normal" human level of thing, right @Jynx ?? )

@creative_writer Jynx and I have an ongoing ... noticing... that some of my traits/thoughts can be a little ADHD, even though no one in my mental-health-support life who has been trained in psychology/psychiatry has ever suggested they think i could be adhd or autistic lol. 😅 I am either sub-clinical or I just learned behavioural management skills enough that it didn't become an "obvious impairment".

I want to take back the power I lost during trauma but not sure how. It has to be healthy, taking back power through ED isn’t sustainable. It’s been scary trying to bounce back from the ED, because I feel a loss of control. Maybe healing is just like that, it doesn't always feel comfortable. On a logical level I know I am in control now. Even if I am not in control of somatic flashbacks, I am still in control over other aspects of my body. I can choose how I move my body, how I internally and externally take care of myself.

TW SA

Hey @creative_writer ,

Good to see you. I hear you have a lot of ongoing rumination and thoughts that you have to wrestle with.

What is something within your control at the moment that you can focus on to help yourself feel even just that little bit better?

Hey @creative_writer , there's no shame in using AI. If it works for you, why not?

Some people find it very therapeutic.

Are you a reader?