Connect with people who understand what you are going through,
seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're
free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.
Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
I have multiple mental illnesses including Bipolar 2, cptsd, OCD, social anxiety. I’m also neurodivergent, ADHD and ASD. I already have tons of labels and a lot going on. I’m getting assessed for an ED on Monday during my psych appointment, I reckon I meet criteria so I am anticipating another diagnosis. I know it explains my how I’ve been feeling but it’s another label, I hate feeling so broken and feeling like I’m complicated. I know my disordered eating habits are adversely affecting my mental and physical health, I’ve just been in denial for so long and would also get defensive when people commented on my eating habits or asked about them.
In response to: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
JynxModerator
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@creative_writer oh that sounds so similar to me. I didn't even realise how much I used to dissociate as a kid, and I spent many years gaslighting myself into thinking I didn't need help. I think it does make sense, cos who would want to admit they had mental health issues? If stigma weren't so horrendous, maybe more people would be more willing to get help sooner.
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@Jynx children often need role models to help them process their emotions. School felt too overwhelming for me, I would sort of disconnect.
There used to be more stigma around mental health. I had this lovely counsellor at school who I spoke to a few times, but then she left. I was getting SI and urges to SH as a 16 year old. My emotions felt so uncontrollable all of a sudden, it felt scary. I felt attachment trauma kicking in, but it felt sort of fake. I knew I had loving parents, but something felt off. There was obviously the school bullying issues at play. Additionally school stress wasn’t helping
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
JynxModerator
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@creative_writer yeah my imagination was very richly developed quite young... 😅
Yeah I feel that. So confusing to have it hit when you're young, and have no way of processing/contextualising/reassuring yourself. And we definitely are under a lot more pressure at school than I think any of us realise at the time, hey - especially socially.
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@Jynx I was a dreamy child.
I feel like a lot of people underestimate school stress, school can be hectic. I didn't have any friends at school that really stuck. We all sort of moved on. I didn't click well with people, maybe I was sort of distance, but I couldn't help it. I have a history of shutting down in social situations.
I think people also don't understand how sensory overload can eat away at us. Not knowing you have sensory overload is rough. I started getting migraines as a teen, my eyes become super sensitive to light. I had countless study self-study periods where I had to rest
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
JynxModerator
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
Yeah the not knowing is gnarly hey @creative_writer - it's hard when we are taught to judge ourselves by standards that are simply not applicable.
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@Jynx applying the same standards isn’t fair. Not sure if any of my teachers realised I was ND, at least none of them said anything. Not sure if it’s a polite thing to say “I think you’re on the spectrum” to a student. I don’t think there was as much awareness around ND. I think I’ve had teacher worry about my quietness. I used to be selectively mute at one point.
The thing is I’ve always known I was different, but it sort of became internalised self criticism. I felt like other students found me too weird. I also feel like many of us ND are often emotionally invalidated, because our emotions can seem too much. Trying to accept the intensity of my emotions is challenging, hence why I push them in and try not to cry. I used to cry a lot as a kid and it wasn’t received well
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
JynxModerator
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@creative_writer yeah it's tough when our Very Big Feelings are seen as 'inappropriate' hey.
It's hard making space for that intensity hey. Maybe there's some strats we could brainstorm? Could be a good discussion question in one of the ND threads 🤔
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@Jynx yeah, it’s hard. Some people have opinions on what that “appropriate display of emotion” looks like. Then they expect us NDs to know. I’ve spent years trying to learn to read and mimic people. Though I’ve never found a definite answer on “appropriate displays of emotions”. Like everyone is going to react differently to grief, can we say to someone theirs is not right.
I do feel like I react more than the average person, I try to control it but it all builds up over time. I’ve gaslighted myself into believing I’ve made a big deal out of everything I’ve been through. For some people it might be too much. Suppression has felt like the safe thing to do. I’m still trying to figure out how to let it out safely. I don’t really let it out often, tears are generally swallowed in
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
JynxModerator
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@creative_writer yeah 'normal' and 'appropriate' are nonsense words when you really break em down 😋 I do think there's times when it's okay to say an emotional display is inappropriate - like expressing lots of excitement at a funeral for instance. But so long as it's not hurting anyone, then it should be okay for us to express however feels right to us. Should.
Alas.
I find that stuff that I repressed will always come out eventually. Might be bawling my eyes out over literal spilled milk but it finds it's way 😂
In response to: Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Mixed feelings-might be getting another diagnosis (ED)
@Jynx I can only think of extreme instances when it’s inappropriate too. Most cases are a bit difficult to categorise. I think diagnoses can be helpful. However, when those diagnoses are used too clinically, i.e. disorder=abnormal reaction, it can become an issue. Almost half of the population experiences mental illness in their lifetime, does that make almost half of the population abnormal?
It’s hard when suppression and repression has been norm for me growing. It is true sometimes the smallest things trigger us. People don’t realise the big reaction is actually a build up of emotions. I suppose I do need to learn to be more comfy, maybe therapy is the place to start
We're improving how you access SANE services, starting with Forums
You’ll soon be able to use one secure login to access all SANE services.
For added security, members are now required to log in with their email address and password - member names are no longer supported for logging in.
If you had a Forums account before 19 May 2026 and haven’t set up your new login yet, you'll be prompted to set up your new secure login when you sign-in.
