How to challenge your negative thoughts

hi @rav3n

i struggle with this. i saw my dr this afternoon and told him. he said its the trauma and deep seated comments and behaviour when i was a child. he said i dont' allow myself to be happy to which i replied i don't know.

yes, feeling happy feels weird; it feels fake. it's hard becuse its not my "norm" feeling

sorry its hard to explain

i am seeing my new psychologist on friday, i am looking forward to meeting her.

i have been silently 'talking' to my dad every night. i tell him what ive done for the day and how much i miss him. and then .... i cry

this week is a quiet week with not many appts or things to do. see this is my worry - i always end up by the end of the week in an emotional mess; boredom; no motivation etc

today was ok at work - the day went very quick. it was a busy day with customers. so many people sick with flu and winter bugs.

hope you are well. hi @Shaz51 @tyme @AuntGlow and others

Heya @BlueBay !

Great to see you. I'm so glad you had such a lovely time for your bday.

I've just read your post about some of the challenges you are facing right now in terms of battling some f the deep-seated trauma that you've endured. I hope things go well for you when you speak to your new psychologist, and you can find a way through some of these challenges.

As for work... I didn't know you were back at work 🙂 How's it going for you?

Hi @tyme

I was offered a job at one of the pharmacies they I worked at 7 yrs ago. It’s one day a week 10-3. I have been back about 6 weeks. Same staff (only 2) same customers who actually recognized me!!! I was very very overwhelmed and anxious to start but it felt like I never left. Shop is 6 mins from home.

I'm actually super excited about it @BlueBay . I'm mindful you may not be feeling the same though.

It sounds like they really valued you. Would you say that the 10-3 shorter shifts are helpful to get you out of the house?

Wow... I don't even know what else to say! (I'm a little bit excited for some reason).

Sorry if that is the wrong emotion to feel here as you may be feeling quite anxious!

Hey @tyme the only reason I took the job was because the hours. It’s just enough. I get a 15 min break for lunch. And it gets me out of the house.

you make perfect sense! @BlueBay i'm really glad you've continued to open up and lean on your dr, they seem to be a great support - and i hope the appt this Friday goes well!

it's so awesome to hear about your job! sounds like a good way to keep ya busy, and it's nice when there's familiarity in customers and workers too. would you be open to doing more shifts in the future or do you prefer one day a week?

hi @rav3n i think for now one day a week is just right. I don't want anymore shifts. but in saying that if someone is sick or on holidays i can take extra shifts (if i am available).

i saw my counsellor today (i think for the last time) and i was anxious in the session. i walked out feeling really bad, because i haven't told her yet that i have decided to change psychologists. i started to cry feeling horrible in not knowing what to. i started to panic.

i don't want to tell her face to face because i know i will cry the whole time. i am thinking maybe emailing her but have no idea what to say to her. she has been my counsellor for 2 years. but the last 6 months i feel i have got nowhere with her. do you have any suggestions on how to let her know i am leaving.

feeling a bit overwhelmed

that sounds good! @BlueBay

awhh that's okay! it's a tricky position to be in, and it's not always easy explaining why or even saying goodbye. but you are doing what's best for you, and i'm proud of you for that.

writing a goodbye email sounds like a nice idea, i'd be happy to help!

i also found some phrases online that might be helpful to pick apart?

i hope this helps you get started!

thanks so much for your suggestions @rav3n i will have a think about what to write.

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@BlueBay wrote:

Hey @tyme the only reason I took the job was because the hours. It’s just enough. I get a 15 min break for lunch. And it gets me out of the house.

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Good on you for taking that step of faith @BlueBay 🙂