Tillogram

Will be asking the specialists those questions @Till23

Soo many ssues, could be any one of them , and osteoarthritis @tyme

I still can't believe my mum is gone either , still think it is affecting me and it will be her birthday on Monday

Hearing you @Shaz51 . And I think it's important to be able to celebrate her life as part of remembering her.

Yes definitely ask @Shaz51, no point in being in pain if you can do something about it.

Dad's birthday was while I was away @Shaz51 - I was able to take myself on a long walk on that day in nature and that was good. I did something he would have been interested in as well, so I felt happy I could do that

Soo glad you did that for your dad's birthday @Till23

Yes it could be the kidney as the toxins are going around the body causing other complications

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@Till23 wrote:

@Jynx do you have any experience with dissociation?

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@Till23 here n there! Why do you ask hun? 😊

Hi @Jynx thanks for response.

@Till23 think I found the post, I supported it.

sounds like it was a little beyond what you've experienced, which can totally send one spinning hey. What felt different about it?

I mostly experience the derealisation-type, where it feels like I'm behind a fog and I have to keep tryna pull my focus back to the present.

Yes that's the correct post @Jynx thanks for seeking that out and your response.

@Till23 honestly that kinda makes sense if you were in the midst of a conflict. Especially with an important figure like a psych, with whom we often build very close relationships with!

If it reminded your body of incidents experienced when you were younger (e.g. conflicts with caregivers/attachment figures), maybe your nervous system responded automatically with this intense level of dissociation - to protect you from the pain of a potential rejection by an attachment figure.

Often if I am SUPER dissociated, it's because something has felt like a threat to my social relationships. What do you reckon, could it be something like that?

Did you and your psych repair the rupture? aka did you work it out?

Thanks for your response @Jynx. It was my first appointment back after my trip. Psych had had a short break before my trip so it was a 6 weeks break altogether.

We have made another appointment for next week.

She said contact Sane as much as I want until then, she knows I have utilised forums and I had guided recovery in the past another time when I had to leave that therapy because I was seeing her as part of my cancer so it was psych-oncology, since I finished treatment I had to leave, plus it's a session limited service. She doesn't realise the phone line isn't currently active.

Other things happening are returning from overseas to empty house as my dog died just before I left on trip and my Dad died exactly one year and 3 hours ago, so anniversary of that. I have jetlag and it's a lot colder than it was last week when I was away so all of that is disorienting

Sorry long post, late in shift