Tillogram

Hey @Till23 ,

Hearing you . Don't worry about mods. We respond when we can. You have such a large heart for everyone. I'm hearing how stressful like is. Please don't compare yourself to others. If so, then I ought to be put to shame when I consider how inspirational your story is.

Focus on that which is within your control. When things seems out of control, consider even the small things you can hang on to.

We each have our own journeys. No two journeys are the same, and neither our responses to the journey we are given.

We're sitting with you as you ride out this wave. It may be a bigger than usual wave, but you are not alone.

Take your time. Respond when you feel up to it. There's no pressure at all.

@Till23

sitting with you my friend and sending you lots of understanding hugs

as @tyme is right

I may have been here for over 10 years but through different stages and ages and situations over the time

we can only do what we can do ,and when we can

I still feel at times not sure how to respond to what members ask

Remember you are awesome, wonderful friend says me and many more here that knows you xxx

Thanks @tyme.. I hope you are having a good day..

. I went to sport training today and then we go and have breakfast afterwards at a nearby place.. I went to sport and then the breakfast place, but I did not feel hungry, so I just had a coffee.. I felt disconnected from people, like I often do..

I just think I have to come to the acceptance that this is how the rest of my life will be, even if I feel disconnected from other people.

I know I am lucky and I have been able to do many things in my life, like go overseas and even though I've had/have a couple of health issues, overall I am healthy, I am able to participate in sport.

I know feeling regretful is not helpful either. I know I should learn from it and try to do things moving forward.

Anyhow thanks for responding.

Thanks @Shaz51.. As I've said many times,, your presence on the forums is a shining light for many people,, with all the support you give to others.. I know you have had a difficult time lately and I hope that eases for you. I was only a carer for a short time and I know how difficult it can be, so for you to be doing so for many people it seems for so long is amazing. And that's apart from your presence on the forums, which is incredibly helpful.

I guess that going out, even if you feel distant from others, has it's place @Till23

You live alone, right?

Life has its ups and downs. Maybe this is just one of the down periods? Who knows? If you find yourself concerned with ASD, ADHD, it may be good to chat to your dr - if that's what you want.

For now, I'd encourage you to focus on what is meaningful, whether it's a distraction or not. So then hopefully, you can ride out this wave.

Yes I agree @tyme,, life does have its ups and downs... and even though you say who knows?? I feel my experience over the last several decades possibly indicates a different situation currently,, but there are some similarities..

.

Maybe I'm having a period of skewed thinking.. Maybe a cognitive distortion?? Who knows??

Sorry for taking you away from others because as you say I can speak to my GP if I have concerns about MH..

Who knows where this wave will take me??

And I know you thrive on always learning @Till23 . This wave may take you to new places. As for the ADHD and ASD concerns, feel free to bounce ideas of the community. In victoria, drs now have access to training to allow for diagnosis of ADHD which will be so helpful for many people.

Yeah, our brains can play tricks on us, so sometimes, by knowing these tricks, we are more able to identify and work proactively.

Over the years, I've learnt a lot about how my brain thinks, and it has really helped me challenge my thoughts.

There are so many factors that can cause our brains to see things in a skewed way. It's like having a dark lens that you are looking through. It can be chemical imbalances, hormones, pain, pre disposition, trauma, etc.

We are all so different.

There are so many waves @tyme,, different types,, I quite like waves,, so many metaphors.. So much explanation of life..

What are thoughts?? Just chemicals moving in your brain causing electrical signals..

I challenge my thoughts,, am aware of different distortions and biases,, but usually come to the same conclusions.. Maybe that’s hardwired now.. But that may be a distortion in itself,, what is life really in the end,, just atoms,, as different as we are, as similar we are..

I don't want to bother anyone here anymore with my stuff,, I've utilised enough of people's time,, probably too much..

Anyhow,, no need to respond.. I might go and see some sea waves..

@AuntGlow

Thank you for your reflections @Till23 🥰

Please know that we check in because we want to know how you are going - genuinely.

You also don't need to respond if you don't have the space, there is never any pressure. Everyone here gets what it's like to ebb and flow in our capacity.

I understand that feeling of little things feeling like too much. I find this happens when my window of tolerance has shortened due to focusing on external things more than my own needs.

I am sensing that connecting to your authentic self sounds really important right now, and that masking is really depleting you of all of your wonderful life-force energy - which must be so hard.

Is this something you have been able to discuss with your psychologist?

Also, please know that soooo many people feel how you do. In fact, I think reading your words would be really healing for others - to know they are not alone. I know that shame feels big right now, but I am here to tell you that we see you, we appreciate you, and we are privileged to receive your authentic self.

We're in this together, remember? 💪💛

I read that you feel certain patterns are now 'hardwired' @Till23

Have you looked into neuroplasticity much?

I read a book called The Woman Who Changed her Brain. I know it's been a controversial book, but for me, it gave me a lot of hope in knowing that what I do can infact change my brain.

To this day, I really firmly hold fast to neuroplasticity. The brain is like a muscle. If you don't use parts of it, then it gets weaker. And if there are parts we always use (eg the emotional brain), then it in fact gets much stronger.