Functioning with ADHD

Hey @creative_writer how's your arvo?

Sucks to feel like we're at the bottom of the pit, hey. I think it can feel like there's no way out - but the way out is just one we haven't yet found, and becomes obvious in time.

@AuntGlow I don't think she felt super comfortable about all the meds I was on. She did offer online appointments. I obviously spoke to her beforehand, it was good she communicated her preferences beforehand.

I'm sorry, today has just been super hard. I found something that worked (can't say too much, but it was a type of substance), but I no longer have access to it, and I don't know if I could get access to it. I don't know how to cope with the SI and flashbacks. I'm trying to stay safe, but it is hard. I think I am getting closer and closer to SH. But I will try to be safe even if I do end up acting on it

@Jynx I certainly do hope it becomes easier with time. I think when you're in that pit, even waiting for appointments with supports feels like forever. I know I need to be patient. I'm just coping the best I can right now

@creative_writer one step at a time hun. Big/sudden changes to our chemical balance is gonna make everything a lil bit harder.

Do you have much on for the evening?

@Jynx I am having takeaway tonight with homemade brown rice. I am sticking to grilled meat, my stomach hasn't been super happy (due to a number of factors).

I am trying to shift my focus, I got a triggering song stuck in my head. The amount of family drama in my extended family is super huge, don't want to think about it right now. Don't want to spend my evening thinking about the toxic someone who broke up the family. I don't blame my mum for absorbing the intergenerational trauma. However, it is true if you try not to think about something, you do, it's called the pink elephant scenario. Might try to listen to something soothing to slow down

@creative_writer aye it's a tough one that dang pink elephant!!

Throw you a distraction then I shall! Hmmm oh! How'd that show end up going, about Vlad the Impaler? Or alternatively, a less violent topic haha.... been doing any writing lately?

@Jynx pink elephants will always be pink elephants.

I listened to something else for around 13 minutes. I also did my head massage and detangling, when you’re blessed with wild hair 😂.

Vlad hasn’t come yet. The violence might ramp up once he is here. Did you know he grew up with the Ottomans? The documentary is a bit too modern in language and it’s like it’s been given a Western touch.

I didn’t attend the last creative writing workshop because I didn’t feel up to it. Maybe I will tomorrow night

@creative_writer crows nest extra wild eh? Hehe

Everything gets westernised these days hey! I was chatting about it recently - in reference to Biscoff spread spreading haha - it's based on the Dutch speculoos cookies which there are many brands of, but Biscoff seems to have really cornered the Western market!

Hope he shows up soon, but that it's not too scary, or too impaley!! 😋

Totally legit, gotta spend our spoons carefully hey!! Is it on every week?

@Jynx my hair is pretty much a crows nest, it's worse when it is super dry. I have to use lots of nourishing products. My scalp is not capable of producing much oil and it's been that way for a long time. I used to get shit loads of shedding, I've been trying to care for it, it's not shedding as much anymore, but it's growing so slowly. I'll wait and see what my bloods say.

Everything is so Westernised, I feel like they would've been more conservative in real life than in the documentary. I don't think I've tried Biscoff spread, is it any good? It is true Western food is everywhere now. I do have to admit, I prefer ethnic food.

I've seen a lot on TV, I've seen savage Genghis Khan followers in other Turkish historical TV shows. They were weird and violent. Though they would blur the violence in those shows.

I am running low on spoons. I've been listening to some sad music, not sure if it helping or making it worse. It can help you process emotions and not feel so alone. I do also know too much sad music can get too much

Can I check in with how things are feeling for you now @creative_writer? Are those thoughts still present?

I am glad you are turning to music to process how you're feeling. I usually dance, speak out what I am feeling, or journal at the same time. You may even find that putting some fun, light music on helps to connect you with a sense of joy! Could you give that a go? ☺️🫶