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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

Battles

Battles

Hi all, does anyone else just feel like life is just one big sh!t show? It's just one thing after another, constant drama, family issues, money struggles, stress, anxiety it's just always something.

When do things get easier, do things ever change?

I've been through more than i care to think about in my life but today has pushed me to breaking point and it's bringing up alot of bad memories of previous suicide attempts.

I just feel like it's not worth it, it's not worth fighting, not worth hanging on anymore.

13169 replies

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In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

Morning @MissGremlin

I'm just making myself a coffee. I've taken Luna for a walk around the block and have been doing a little bit of study. I was lectured yesterday about using O'Week (this week) to get ahead of the study before official classes start next week. I thought I'd give it a go. I'm not sure how long I'll last studying today though. I find that my brain gets tired quickly.

I feel a bit weird and disconnected today...it happened a little yesterday too.

How's it going over there? How did Miss Stella go last night?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury well done for taking Luna for a walk and doing some study. It's ok if you only get a little bit done, the fact that you are doing any at all especially when feeling disconnected is an incredible achievement.

She was really good, slept through the night until 5.30am when we did a quick toilet break and then back to bed until about 9am when I gave them both breakfast.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

Thank you for being supportive @MissGremlin I'm going to pop the study away soon. I guess if my goal was to get a head start - then I've done that, seeing as we don't start until next week.

I'm glad she was a good girl. First nights can be tough. I remember Luna's first night. It was my intention to keep her out of my bed and she slept amazingly in the laundry, but on the second night she cried and cried and was keeping me awake. So, I put her in bed with me. She's been there ever since.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury you're welcome sweet, I'm so proud of you for getting some done.

Yes first nights can be tough, it was more Casper last night that wouldn't settle first cos of having her in the house. But he eventually curled up on my pillow and went to sleep. I had Casper on my pillow and Stella pushed up behind me, they've both got their places ❤️. Awww sweet Luna, she just wants to be with you ☺️

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@AlwaysMyself Hello lovely. How are you? Thank you for thinking of me. I’ve been unwell and not able to manage forums. I’m trying to slowly catch up.

ps support button not working

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

I've packed the study up for today @MissGremlin and I'm about to have something to eat.

I love that they sorted out their sleep places. I hope there's room in that bed for you though, my friend.

Luna does want to be with me. I think I've said before, she's never far away and if I leave a room, she has to follow.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury you did so well with your study sweet. What are you going to have to eat?

Haha yeah I have a tiny bit of the bed 😂. But even when I didn't have a dog for a while I still slept on the very edge of the bed.

Yes you've said about it before, it's so sweet the bond you have with each other. I love how they are like our shadows, never far behind us. Casper and Stella are the same.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin I had a toasted ham and cheese sandwhich. It's my current food fixation. I either have one at breakfast, or one at lunch.

I'm glad you've got a little sliver of bed space.

What are you up to today?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury i love toasted ham and cheese sandwiches. I had ham, tomato and cheese toasted croissants yesterday.

I've been laying on my lounge watching movies. I'm starting to doze off, the heat takes everything out of me.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

It sounds a bit odd @MissGremlin but as I said, I've been having a ham and cheese sandwhich on Banjo's bakery sesame seed bread, a day for months. I think it's a neurodivergence thing, that I don't really get sick of them.

It's warm here today too. It's been labelled a "heat wave." And we have big warnings about bush fires. Doze off if you need to, your body is clearly asking for sleep.

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