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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

Battles

Battles

Hi all, does anyone else just feel like life is just one big sh!t show? It's just one thing after another, constant drama, family issues, money struggles, stress, anxiety it's just always something.

When do things get easier, do things ever change?

I've been through more than i care to think about in my life but today has pushed me to breaking point and it's bringing up alot of bad memories of previous suicide attempts.

I just feel like it's not worth it, it's not worth fighting, not worth hanging on anymore.

13169 replies

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In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@Former-Member i don't have any subscriptions myself but others let me use theirs as they know how much i need distractions. There's no way I could afford them, the only thing I pay for is Spotify and that's cos I need music. I have a massive DVD collection so even if i didn't have the streaming apps I'd still always have something to watch.

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin Holy crap I've just seen the time, I need to do my meditation and mantra before bed. I'll probably be back on just before bed, but if I'm not, I hope you're in a better state than earlier, and goodnight, fingers crossed you get some good sleep. Thanks for the entertaining chat this evening

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin I never really got into spotify, I did have a hacked free premium version, but I use soundcloud for music, it's free and the UK hardcore rave sets I listen too go for over an hour usually, so I rarely listen to ads

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@Former-Member time flies when you're having fun. Thanks for the chats today. Hope you get a good night's rest 😊.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin you're more than welcome, I hope I've helped

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@Former-Member i hated Spotify first cos the ads annoyed me but I caved and paid for it and I'd really be lost without it now.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@Former-Member it's definitely helped to keep distracted. Hoping i can get more than 2 hours of sleep tonight.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin have you tried reading books? they knock me out, which would explain why I haven't read any books for years, yet I have so many I want to read, mainly psychic, paranormal, natural healing subjects, I've never been one for fiction. fingers crossed that you get more than 2 hours. Sweet dreams

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@Former-Member i don't read much cos I struggle with comprehension.

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin

I got most things done.i guess. I had to go to the shop in the afternoon, but I just didn't want to go back sitting at home so I went for a drive and ended up sitting down near the beach. I basically just kept to myself for the rest of the day. Which by now, I've just had enough of, so I'm having an early night.

I think the adoptees workshop on identity and belonging on Saturday just took it out of me. It didnt help that it started with a bit of a discussion on things that we struggled with. Not fitting in and feeling rejected was a big one. We were then give a task we're we had to break into pairs to have a discussion with someone and then give a brief summary of what the other person told us. Long story short, there was an odd number of people which meant one person was left without a partner. I think we know who that was. I sort of just mentally checked out after that. And then the day that wasn't any special occasion at all today was the the crappy cherry on the sh1tty cake that was a steaming pile of a weekend. Other than that, it was great! 😂

What did you get up to today? How is Casper? I hope you're giving him plenty of belly rubs from me.

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