Battles

@Jynx yes I've done all of that. Hard to reduce the sensory input, even the aircon making noise is irritating me but need the airflow or I feel like I'm suffocating. Like even my heart beat is super loud and annoying me. Massive sensory overload but yet there's only music playing and the aircon on. My hands feel dry and the paper when I'm colouring feels icky, my lips are dry which just doesn't feel right. Why can I notice every little thing right now.

@MissGremlin aww nooooo it's like being betrayed by your own skin when the colouring is interrupted!

Might be from adrenaline? Tends to slow time down and make us HYPERAWARE. But it also means it should pass soon enough, esp if you're doing all the lil self-soothey bits you are doing!

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@MissGremlin wrote:

@rav3n I'll have a look at some stage and then we will go from there. Just need to get myself out of this state first.

Haha that's hilarious 😂. Frogs are very cute but can imagine it would have given your cousin a shock 😂.

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@MissGremlin oh yep, defs gave him a shock! he kept checking my sister's hands before she entered the car to make sure there were no frogs in her possession 😆 i wish i had her confidence to hold frogs, i could only hold ladybugs! were you one of those people that liked playing around with bugs and lil animals? besides pets ofc.

@Jynx my body betrays me 😂. Like I have a phobia of certain feelings that I just can't handle, toilet paper, sand paper, walls, paper sometimes.

Self-soothey bits, you mean laying on my bed sprawled out cos everything is just too much. Like I don't want to move, I don't want to feel and I certainly don't want anything to touch me right now.

@rav3n haha i bet he kept checking 😂.

I love holding all different things, geckos, frogs, praying mantis, ladybugs, butterflies. Nothing is off limits really.

Don't you know @MissGremlin there's actually a 'correct' and an 'incorrect' way to self-soothe, cos every person is the same, and has the same needs, so cookie cutter approaches are actually the best way in mental health.

/sarcasm LOL

Honestly wish I was sprawled out on bed right now 😅

@Jynx loving the sarcasm.

Hoping my bed will swallow me and I'll fade into the darkness.

I need hugs and I need everything possible to try and tether me to this world tonight.

I'm out, might see you around again maybe. Every part of me is fighting against each other and I really can't take it anymore.

Take care of your wonderful self best you can @MissGremlin and I trust you to know when you need to seek that external support!! Fingers crossed it ain't needed tho - cos you GOT THIS!!

💜

@Jynx maybe. Not sure i even trust myself to be able to make that judgement at the moment but I guess we will see. I really don't got this, not tonight.

@MissGremlin that could just mean you've already reached the point where contacting crisis service is best bet? Obvs you know best what you're needing, just some food for thought 💜

I gotta dash hun, sending many a hug your way!

🫂🫂🫂🫂