Battles

@MissGremlin a bad day for me honey but I am not adding to your burdens. May Sunday be at least okay for you beautiful xoxo

How are you managing?

@ENKELI I'm here if you want to chat about anything sweetheart, it's definitely not adding to my burdens.

I've been in a state of shock since, I went onto Facebook before and it was flooded with posts for her which really just brought everything up again. I did manage to vacuum my house earlier though before retreating to the safety of my kitchen floor again in a freeze state.

@MissGremlin I want to go back to bed, hide under the covers and pretend life doesn't exist but it's too warm.

I just gave in and took an anti anxiety tablet. I need to focus on the good in life otherwise I will spiral even more than I am at the moment.

I am listening to music and am going to play Fishdom to try and get my mind off the poisonous people related to me.

Is there anything I can do to help you beautiful?

Sitting with you both @ENKELI @MissGremlin

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@NightFury wrote:

Things are feeling a bit sensitive over here @MissGremlin

I'm out at a show, and who do I run into? A group of people I used to be friends with, who absolutely broke me.

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Awww @NightFury , so so sorry to hear. Must be such a difficult time.

@ENKELI oh sweetheart, sending you gentle hugs ❤️. Hoping the anti anxiety tablet helps a bit, it's hard to focus on the good things sometimes. Fishdom sounds like fun and listening to music is always good. I have music playing almost constantly unless I'm watching a movie or TV show.

You just being here helps so much beautiful ❤️.

I spent until about 2pm in bed until I had unexpected visitors and had no choice but to get up.

Thankyou @tyme

@MissGremlin I am a lot calmer now so the meds have kicked in. I too need noise, whether it be music or TV. I usually have Foxtel streaming on my laptop when I am in bed.

I half heartedly want to go to Funnings but will wait until tomorrow as I don't want to drive under the influence of the meds, even though it's a very low dosage.

What shows do you like? I am a reality show tragic, and I also like true crime shows which fortunately Foxtel has a lot of. I like Sci Fi and comedy series.

Narcisister is systematically turning every one of my paternal cousins against me for some reason. I don't know why and guess I never will. It must make her feel good so more power to her. If you have to kick someone in order to make yourself feel better then go for it. But don't tell me you love me and then stick a kn*fe in my back.

@ENKELI I'm glad the meds have kicked in sweet. I lay in bed and listen to music, an audiobook or watch a movie/tv show. Very rarely I get too overwhelmed and need complete silence.

Funnings can easily until tomorrow, it's better to err on the side of caution.

I have safe shows but don't just stick to one specific type. Some are Buffy, Angel, true blood, big bang theory etc. There's movies aswell but lately I've been getting stuck on watching one movie on and over again.

I'm sorry your sister is doing that to you sweet, it's not fair and you most definitely don't deserve it. As they say you can choose your friends but you can't choose your family, though you can distance yourself from one's that only bring you down and cause you pain.

Love and hugs beautiful ❤️.

@MissGremlin so here's the story. The day my dad passed away after speaking with my sister my cousin blocked me on Farcebook and stopped answering my messages and emails. I also found out that my aunt (who I think has passed away) also blocked me. My other cousin who I was on good terms with has also stopped answering my messages even though he has read them.
Then yesterday I messaged another cousin and he said he would get back to me. I messaged him and got nothing back, then found that he too had blocked me.

So of my 6 paternal cousins 5 of them have cut me out of their lives and the only common denominator is my sister. My sister has set her Farcebook settings so that I can't see her comments as she likes to bitch about people to gain sympathy from strangers.

God did reveal to me that he is cutting out the toxic people in my life so I guess that means my entire paternal family.

I want to go to my aunts' funeral to say F you to them all and stick it to my sister who won't be able to attend - she lives in NSW and the funeral will be in my family hometown here in WA. Considering she has only ever met dad's side of the family no more than once or twice in 50 years and I grew up with them makes it a bitter pill to swallow.