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Managing thoughts of suicide & self-harm

Battles

Battles

Hi all, does anyone else just feel like life is just one big sh!t show? It's just one thing after another, constant drama, family issues, money struggles, stress, anxiety it's just always something.

When do things get easier, do things ever change?

I've been through more than i care to think about in my life but today has pushed me to breaking point and it's bringing up alot of bad memories of previous suicide attempts.

I just feel like it's not worth it, it's not worth fighting, not worth hanging on anymore.

13169 replies

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In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury yes it could be. Remember to be gentle with yourself ❤️.

I have only had a few sips of mine as I'm having to cook dinner at the same time.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

What are you cooking? @MissGremlin

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury mash potato, veg and sausages ☺️.

What's on the menu for you tonight?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

Sounds yummy @MissGremlin

I'm cooking beef stroganoff tonight. I love mushrooms, so it's one of my favourites.

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@NightFury ooohh yummy. I love stroganoff and mushrooms are delicious 😋

In response to: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin hey sweetheart, I haven't much been online the last 24 hours except to catch up on study.

Casper looks absolutely adorable, happy birthday!

Did you have your GP appointment today or is it tomorrow?

I have been thinking about you, I've been awake at midnight and not able to sleep, then don't get up until 10am so I am trying to get back into a routine of going to bed at a decent time and getting up earlier.

I hope your GP can help you, you're going through so much at the moment and you deserve a break. A BIG one.
I think I might set notifications for incoming emails from now on so when you post I'll get the message quicker and if I'm awake I can sit with you.

Did you do something kind for yourself today?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

Hello @ENKELI sweetheart, hope the studying is going well for you.

Thankyou for Caspers birthday wishes ☺️.

My gp appointment is tomorrow morning, I'm really nervous about it cos I have alot to tell him and it's hard with time limits.

I'm up at all hours of the night so if you ever want to chat cos you can't sleep you are welcome to tag me, I'm always up for a chat ❤️. Hope you can get back into a routine that works for you sweet.

I'll share my news from this morning with you. I rang housing to check in about the meeting I had with them, turns out the lady that I saw didn't even take a copy of my support letter to put in the system despite saying she would and taking it with her before coming back to give it to me. So no assessment has been done to determine whether my category could be changed. It's now under investigation as to why she didn't take a copy and lodge it for assessment. It makes me wonder if she actually did the same thing last year cos it was her i saw then aswell. Anyway I've now submitted the letter via email and put in as much details as possible about my situation so hopefully it might change something, though even if my category changes it's still like a 5 year wait for housing so not going to help when I only have 11 days left here.

Today was a rest day, I tried to nap but only got 30 minutes before waking up in a panic. I've just sat down in bed and I'm about too start a new diamond art ☺️.

How was your trip to funnings yesterday with your bestie?

Awww i love that picture, thankyou for being here sweetheart and I'm always here for you too ❤️

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin I didn't end up going to Funnings, bestie was sick so we're going to catch up for coffee during the week.

I am really lethargic today, have cut out a lot of sugar, started on unsweetened almond milk instead of moo juice. It's taking a bit to get used to and my gallbladder is causing pain.

I see that the mix up with Housing as a sign that things might just go your way. They haven't shut the door and miracles happen all the time. I'm still holding you up in prayer my lovely. It's annoying that the same thing could have happened a year ago.

If I am still up late I will definitely tag you. I hope Casper enjoyed his birthday, 1 year old, he's still a baby!

This song came up on my play list today and it made me think of you xoxo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gydcChFnzQ

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@ENKELI awww hope she is better soon ❤️.

I can imagine that would definitely be adding to the lethargic feeling, hoping your body adjusts to it quickly. Ouch to the gallbladder pain, hugs to you sweetheart ❤️.

The guy on the phone said that it's still not going to help with the immediate situation that I'm in but it's the fact that it should have been assessed properly the first time. Thankyou sweet, trying to find hope to cling onto but with only 11 days now it's getting so scary.

Casper had a good day and loved his presents and treats, he's a very spoilt and loved boy ☺️.

That song is beautiful, thankyou for sharing. I've added it to my play list now ❤️.

What's on for you tomorrow beautiful?

In response to: Re: Battles

Re: Battles

@MissGremlin I know it's scary, and it's really hard to find any positives at the moment. That is understandable.

I'm glad Casper enjoyed his special day.

Tomorrow for me will be study as I have to have this weeks' work to be submitted on Wednesday.

It's also going to be 37 so I'll be inside keeping cool.

What about yourself gorgeous? What time is your GP appointment? Just breathe and if necessary, write down what you want to tell them. I have had to do that a couple of times.

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