Looking for support

I hear things are hard, but I wonder if staying connected, even a little, can remind you that people care? @Hopeandlove

I care. I really do, and want you to feel supported as you go through these challenges.

However, I also respect your desire if you wish to close your account. Take some time to think about it and if you really want it deleted, you can email us at team@saneforums.org It will take 24-48 business hours to action.

@tyme I'm just at a loss of what to do. I don't want this life but it's what I'm stuck with until my body gives up. Which I hope happens sooner than later. I'm on so much medication that makes me feel sick and dizzy, gives me headaches and just affects me so much.

Thanks for caring, it means alot. But I'm really not worth it that's why I'm alone, I'm too much for anyone.

I'm really curious to understand where this narrative of 'not worthy' comes from @Hopeandlove

Have we said something to make you feel you are not worthy?

No @tyme . It's how I've been treated my whole life by others.

I can see how you continue to hold onto that narrative @Hopeandlove , seeing you've felt this is how people have treated you your whole life.

Can I share that I care? And I think this is why I keep coming back here to this thread... it's because I care - not because I have to.

It's hard to let go of years of being let down and told that you aren't worthy of kindness and compassion.

I really do appreciate the kindness you have shown and I'm sorry if it feels like I'm pushing it away, but I'm not even sure how to begin to accept it.

Maybe that is the key @Hopeandlove ? You have been pushed aside and not supported for so long, so that when people reach out, it's damn hard to see it and then to accept it!

I hear that! It's totally not a walk in the park.

Yet the fact that you continue reaching out here, gives me hope that there is hope, even if it doesn't feel like it.

Even if I check-in with you when I'm on, it may help you to feel less alone in what you are going through.

I'm not expecting you to change your narrative overnight, but from my own experiences, I believe change CAN happen.

If you met me a few years ago, you would've run the other way! I was a horrible horrible person. Angry, resentful and unbearable. But yes, things have changed...

And the fact that I'm no one special, and the 'brain change' happened for me, I am confident you also have a chance.

I'm going to have to go soon, but I'd love to continue talking about this. I can perhaps invite you into this la-la brain of mine...

Every day when I wake up, I'm in awe of how my brain changed so much - in terms of how it things, perceives things and reacts.

@tyme I'm not even sure how to reply to all of this at this stage.

I'll try to get on tomorrow to reply when I can read through it properly.

But I really am thankful that you have taken the time to chat with me tonight.

I'm going to get some sleep and I hope to chat with you when you are on again.

Have a good night.

That's okay. Take your time.

I'm off now too @Hopeandlove

Good night.

Night @tyme