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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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In response to: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde yes yes yes, yummmm! I thiiiiinnk there will be classic, extra choc, choc vanilla, and choc mint!! What do you reckon?

And a big, soft pile of very comfy cushions, all laid out so that several people can all pile in - ooh or maybe it's like a whole section where the entire floor is cushiony, with little alcoves and more plushie piles and lots of blankets and pillows shaped like funny things 😋😍

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx?

Flashback... I feel really weak

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

I am sorry my responses are sporadic again tonight @avant-garde I am flying solo - but I am here. You are here too, with me, and you are safe 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

I know, it's ok, Tyme is usually on but needs to use up some of her leave

*collapses exhausted and disoriented in the sensory room*

drifting in and out...

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde you are the best 😊

*surrounds you with cushions so you're all safe and tucked in, gets hot choccie onto stove*

I gotchu as best I can hun 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

I know, you're my older sibling

You'll be logging off soon

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde eeee that's cool!! I love it!

I'm the youngest of 3 in my family so I've never had a younger sibling before!!

*giggles giddily*

Alas, that I am.... How you travelling, you still pretty floaty?

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx

Got to a point where I had to function so doing my best to do that.

You have that kind of older sibling nature in how you care

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

Teehee and in being a rebel @avant-garde

Cos shhhhhh its definitely not me out here responding to you after 10pm, no no, I always play by the rules 😆

One last squish for the road 🫂🫂 Till tomorrow my dear, I say aideu, and slumber soundly!! 💜

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@Jynx?

931 - 940 of 3,558