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Talking through trauma and PTSD

Running

Running

"Behind every strong person is a story that gave them no choice"

My life is all about a lack of choice.

I'm alive because death would've outed him, it would have sealed his fate in prison.

TW: cultic, rape, trafficking, torture

I'm the daughter of a Satanist...

One trained to breed...

One pregnant at 6 years old...

One prostituted to whoever could afford her...

The girl her dad didn't want...

One men hired to have fun with...

One men experimented with...

One who was tortured for speaking up...

One trained for the sole purpose to please her buyer...

Regardless of age...

Still though...

One who never stayed silent...

One who broke free... twice...

One who rose up...

One who seeks to prove them wrong...

One who has been running for 15 years...

One who just needs to feel heard...

One who went through hell and survived...

That this Phoenix can rise...

She will not be burned...

She's proven that...

I have proven that...

I'm 35 and 90% of those I've been in prolonged abusive situations insufficient evidence for prosecution

A system that protects the abuser more than the survivor

And yet I still try

I don't try for me, I try for the ones after me, the ones like me, that they will see their justice

But for now I run...

From a dad that wants me silenced...

From the nightmares that plague my sleep...

From the memories that invade my mind...

From the choices made for me...

Didn't expect that to come out as poetic as it did

3558 replies

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Re: Running

@AuntGlow

I don't know what support looks like when I miss her like this

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Re: Running

I can imagine it's a very vulnerable feeling for you @avant-garde... do you find that honouring your grandmother in some way helps you to process? Or is something soothing/distracting more helpful? 💛

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Re: Running

@AuntGlow distract, but you finish in 13 minutes

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Re: Running

@avant-garde I do, but don't want to leave you without at least one self-care strategy in place. Do you have any go-to distraction activities that help? ☺️

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@AuntGlow

I got a new fidget yesterday and had a shower and new bed socks on. I also have my bear and my schedule. I'll go reach out on the forums if I need to and do nonograms.

In response to: Re: Running

Re: Running

@avant-garde That sounds really calming and cozy. I am glad to hear you have a plan for soothing yourself this evening. I will check-in tomorrow to see how you are going. Have a good sleep. ☺️✨

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Re: Running

Hello @avant-garde, how are you going sweet? Been a while since I've chatted to you. Take care of yourself ❤️

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Hey @MissGremlin

I think I scared @ArraDreaming off with the contents of my head

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Re: Running

Don't worry @avant-garde, I scare myself off with the contents of my head 😂

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Re: Running

@MissGremlin

My head is normally just amusing.

So the session times have come out for Friday, going to see Lilo and stitch

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