Ups and Downs of Husband`s Mental Illness

Oh dear @Shaz51 double whammy -
I do hope they can get good clearance around spots next appt and I hope Mr Shaz can bring up the other things soon, but also they are dealt with in an appropriate and compassionate manner.

Happy Valentine's Day fellow up and downers. I am planning on making Mr D the black forest cheesecake for dessert tonight.

One thing I have really noticed, since learning about MI, getting support and being able to cope better, how to respond better to him and not be so confused about why things happen (as well as him being more appropriately medicated), things between Mr D & myself are so much better.

My mr. sent his mother Valentine’s Day flowers.

I will probably receive some too.

😱🤬😔

How has your day been @Shaz51? Any tokens of love your way? We never used to worry about it but now we have the 'after' I think why not?

@Faith-and-Hope
I sometimes don't know what to say, I curse MI and its effects. Things were very tough for Mr D & myself for a while there, I very much appreciated and took heart with Enigma explaining her inability to show the love she felt. There is certainly a before and after for us, but I do now get expressions of love. I pray so much for you in this regard as I do for @Determined.

Thank you @Former-Member. It means a lot ..... what you are doing now to live well despite the presence of the mi is something that gives me a guideline for the future .... but we are really in limbo until we have a dx.

I did receive flowers today also, as did our 2 single daughters, which blended it a bit and made the flowers to MIL less obvious, but the fact remains that it is a similar relationship at an emotional level to being “the other woman”, and neither of them see anything wrong with that.

He is so not the person that he used to be that he has no idea how to have a relationship with me .... he is completely lost within himself .... and what makes the MIL “other woman” relationship work is her total enabling of the e.d. and the other mi behaviours that ought not to be enabled.

Taking the higher (proper) moral ground means I have to stand outside that arena like a spectator .... but at the same time I am in an arena by staying here in the midst of this and trying to hold it, with as much stability as I can.

There really isn’t much that can be said .... but I am listening and learning ..... and the grace you exhibit under fire bears me courage .....

Bless you ❤️