Thanks for getting back to me @Sunnyside226!
Dealing with grief is tough, let alone when there's multiple people in your life that you've lost. It's also so common for it to bring up fears of losing other people in your life. It is scary to think about the potential of losing others but know that the loss of your loved ones isn't because you failed.
When faced with such traumatic experiences, it's only natural to look for someone or something to blame. But sometimes, things just happen and it's out of our control (which is also scary to come to terms with).
Grief is such a big, consuming thing to go through, and at times it can feel impossible to heal. Grief feels different for everyone. For some it feels like time can heal those wounds. For others, the wounds never heal but we find ways to cope with it day-to-day.
It's okay to want to keep your feelings to yourself right now, sometimes we need time to sit with it and process it before we can or want to seek out help. But know that whenever you are ready to take that step, there are supports out there for you to turn to 🌼