Oscillation between two mind sets

That is really rough @creative_writer 😢 If you had had that support and understanding earlier then things may be different now - so hard when everyone just had their head in the sand.

Yes it has been often overlooked in girls @creative_writer but thankfully that is changing.

I suppose we cannot think back as we cannot change the past - just need to do what we can now to help ourselves the best we can.

Just a thought @creative_writer - have you looked into getting some ND folks on your treating team? I'm just speaking from my experiences getting a late ADHD diagnosis, that once I knew and sought out a psych who herself has ADHD, things suddenly got a lot easier in my therapeutic dialogues. Having that inherent mutual understanding and not having to explain my ways of thinking or outline why I struggle with certain things was actually huge. And just in general too, I've found that surrounding myself with other ND folks has been really beneficial to my mental health. Maybe having that shared experience and understanding could help you in learning to let your guard down and build that trust?

You mentioned getting paired up with a peer support worker, which is absolutely wonderful! Do you know if your PSW is ND?

Yeah it can be really validating to find someone with shared experience hey @creative_writer. I hope your PSW ends up being a good fit for you!

It's interesting you haven't explored your ND much yet - not a bad thing mind you, just curious. I have a friend who suspected she has ADHD, but her psychologist wanted to work on her trauma stuff first before going down that path. I personally found that rather odd, because for me, getting diagnosed was like all the puzzle pieces slotting into place. Suddenly I had this much deeper understanding of why I operate the way I do, and I think my differing neurotype had a LOT to do with my trauma responses. I don't think I could have made the progress I have made without that understanding. Plus, finding coping strategies that are geared towards ND brains has been wayyyy more effective for me. Well, everyone's recovery journey is different anyway, but still thought I'd share - yay for lived experience solidarity!

@creative_writer yeah emotional expression can be sooo different for ND folks. Hence finding resources that are built by and for ND folks are super important, in my eyes. I swear sometimes my emotions come out at the most RANDOM times.

I have found as well my emotional guage feels wonky, like I'll be going through stuff that should be making me emotional and I'm fine, but then one little thing pushes me over the edge and I'm suddenly OVERWHELMED. Sometimes even smallest stuff will push me over too, like I get my headphones caught on a door or I drop something on my toe, lol.

I have tried to illustrate what I mean here! Picture this being like one of those fire danger charts with a needle that you move across. Hopefully this makes sense!

Does this resonate with your emotional experience too?