Far and Away

I understand that busy mind @Faith-and-Hope especially after seeing the counsellor. Having things you need to think about for the week can certainly take over your thoughts - especially directly after a session. It is a great idea to put some of that energy into your homework while you are up early - allows you to focus on something else for a while as well as fill in time in a constructive way.

I read your despcription of the gallery works and if that is the kind of review you will be doing for your course then you will smash it out of the park

Thanks @Former-Member Hope you have some moments of happiness in your day Hon

Thanks @Zoe7 🤗💕

@Former-Member, walking with you too Hon. I hope you have a gentle day. 💐💜

Evening @Faith-and-Hope How was your day Hon?

It was a lovely day @Zoe7 .... catching up on visual diary work progressively.

That is really lovely to hear @Faith-and-Hope and even better that you are catching up on visual diary work progressively. It will be good to have more done before you go away too - will make the break an actual holiday that you can enjoy ...as much as you can with the dynamics in play but hopefully with some special family moments as well.

We wrap the semester before we go @Zoe7, so everything is due in then. It means it will be a true break, as long as it is gentle enough, and D3 is going into bat with her Dad at the moment to try to lock in place that it is .... because his ideas are ballooning.

Thatis good about everything needing to be in before the semester break @Faith-and-Hope ...and go D3 for standing up for herself with what her (and your) needs are for this holiday - that is real progress from her

I think her having these opinions and making it clear that they are her own is something new for him @Zoe7 . I have been concerned for a very long time about how young D3 and S2 were when the switch occurred, especially when it became clear that S2 didn’t even realise there had been a switch ..... probably because the traits were already there before they were triggered to something tsunamic.

The older kids might need to step in with that one, because they have noticed that particularly the youngest doesn’t have any clear memory of “before” Dad, only “after” Dad, and is working to that.

It’s not something any of them can cope with me talking very much about .... for various reasons, including the fact that they are bearing traits themselves, to greater and lesser degrees ...... and those traits tend to focus on fairness ..... and it can’t be fair in any s bar that one parent is unwell in this way and the other is not ..... nobody can “even the ledger”, least of al the well one. It smacks of holding higher ground for them, which equals no-even-playing-field ..... equals play has to stop.

i hope that makes some sort of sense .....

Yeah I think I get it Hon - none of the baby dragons do or want to see that these changes in Mr. are the reality of him changing and that you have kept to your path regardless. That does not mean that all this has not affected you but there is a big division in what they see and what they want to be the reality. So often when there is such a breakdown in relationships such as has happened with you and Mr. is that the kids want someone to blame and in this case there is no clear delineation of where that blame should lie because one party is unwell and if they are unwell then there should not be any blame levelled at them. It is more confounded because the younger ones have little memory of Mr. before all that is associated with his illness come to the fore. It is such a hardposition for you to be in also - knowing the man you fell in love with is still in there ...and the older kids have parts of that to hold onto as well - but the younger ones are not on that same page because they have no terms of reference to refer to. But it is exactly what divides everyone in the family that is also holding it together and central to that is you - such a heavy burden to bear but you do it so incredibly well @Faith-and-Hope