Far and Away

Thanks @CheerBear See my psych in the morning so will definitely be talking about it with her. It has brought up a lot for me but I think I am doing pretty well with not letting those thoughts overtake me completely. It has probably added to my low mood though - along with the ongoing sleep issues from the med reduction - so having to work through all that together. I also think once the school stuff is sorted out that I will have a bit more direction as well - and despite me continuing to say there is nothing I can do but wait it is starting to get to me. I know how much preparation I usually make before school starts and not being able to do that is making me anxious about starting somewhere. I feel like it will mean I will always be on the back foot and that is not where I want to be - that will 100% cause ongoing stress.

So there is a lot going on in my head right now and I am really doing my best to stay on top of it - even if that means sleeping the day away as I have pretty much done today.

Thanks @CheerBear Yes I think sleep is my friend today. No sport on tonight either so planning on an early night ready for my appointment tomorrow morning. It is a 9.30 appointment so will be up and out earliy-ish. It is supposed to be warm again so hopefully the appointment will go okay and I will be able to do some things when I get home and before it gets too hot in the garage.

I think I am doing okay with things but the longer this work thing goes on the more anxious I am becoming. It really needs to be sorted out so I can get prepared. I really hope I hear something tomorrow but if I don't I will be calling HR again.

I have had a couple of messages from friend today but I haven't talked to him about meeting again just yet - need to get this work stuff sorted first I think. A little more going on all together than I would like but it is what it is and I can't change any of it!

@Faith-and-Hope I know you have read ANC and so are up-to-date with how I am going but still needed to do my daily check-in with you. I am sooooooooooooo excited about you coming home soon - I can't wait to have you back here posting and filling us all in on how the last couple of months have been for you. I know others here miss your presence too so they will be happy to have you back as well.

I tried to have a sleep this afternoon but my mind was going too much to relax so I gave up - certainly things from this morning rolling around in my mind still and the continual worry over work. Just posted also that HR rang and had a position but it was fulltime and on a grade 1/2 - neither I could do so they are continuing to look for me. I was clear that I still needed to attend appointments and so needed that Wednesday to do that - what it did say to me though is that HR are confident that I can do the job again if they were considering fulltime for me. Whether that is the case or not that is how I am taking it - some positive thinking from me hey

I haven't got very much further with the garage but I am not pushing myself either - getting this work stuff sorted is taking up more of my headspace than I would like but until it is sorted I am taking it easy on myself - the 'crazy' will start soon enough.

Just about to watch the Hurricanes play on tv - couldn't afford to go to this match (it is in Hobart) but at least watching it at home I can do a couple of things at the same time.

I hope you are getting yourself organised to come home soon - have I mentioned I can't wait until you are back home with us

I have totally missed my forum friend and the day you are back will be a special day indeed - love ya heaps - hugs to you, Visual and D2

Hi @Faith-and-Hope

Hi @Faith-and-Hope I am having very big missing you feelings today - I know it is not long before you are back with us here but today is one of those days when I would have loved you to be around. Nothing massive has happened - just one of those days. DBT was good - but it did bring up some old feelings - been trying to deal with them this afternoon. I also had my GP appointment - we did the review of the MHCP for the psychologist, med review for scripts I needed and BP check - BP is really good so that is a bonus. My pdoc appointment went a bit longer today - we talked a lot about work and despite me still waiting to hear something she is very happy with how I am dealing with it all - she is actually very happy with how I am going altogether. We got so involved in talking about my job that I forgot to talk to her about my sleep and meds - I suspect she would have suggested I stay on the lower dose though so if I have more nights of not sleeping much or waking up several times then I will be re-visiting the meds situation with her next week. There have been a lot of positives in today and I have been trying to focus on those but the trigger from this morning has been really prominent in my thinking. I know I am dealing with it the best I can and circumstances such as the constant wind have added to that - lots of Toby and Cat cuddles needed tonight and early taking of meds so I can hopefully get an early night.

Hope you are well and looking forward to coming home - miss ya heaps Hon

Hi my angel @Faith-and-Hope Soooooooooo excited about you coming home soon

@Faith-and-Hope Will you be home by this time next week?

Yes

@Faith-and-Hope No