Just checking in.

Bugger @Kurra.

Think the universe is telling you you're meant to work until you're 80 😳

I hope it all goes well with the tooth. It seems a bit of a theme on here lately@TAB

Looking forward to seeing what you decide. I lived in a town near Nambour years ago and loved the hinterland. My dog got her second wind there and her arthritis disappeared. Sending hugs 💜🤗🤕🤒

@utopia - True, she will have to the learn the hard way.

Some aren't empathic with MI at all - I found that out when at my lowest. So I invented survival skills. If I was uncomfortable at a function I would seek others out who looked like they would appreciate company and I would talk to them about anything or just let them talk to distract my mind from anxiety. It worked most of the time.

I hope your sister doesn't give you a hard time. Your mum sounds like fun with a good sense of humour. Don't forget the earplugs. Have a good day my friend 😊

Yeah @utopia i really don't do small talk so well anymore unless its weather and there is an interesting weather pattern going on and then I loose them anyway 😳😁. I hope New Years goes well. Today was interesting catching up with my friend, she is the only one who has cared enough to actually read about my diagnosis but I think I forgot I wasn't on the forum and may have been a bit too candid at times 😳 Anyway it was a nice day and great to talk about all sorts of things which distracted me. I hope you get that on the weekend too💜🤗

Ouch @Kurra - that sounds very painful - I hope that it gets sorted very soon for you. Tooth pain is no joke. Hugs xxxx

Dear @Former-Member and @Former-Member

It helps me.

Thank you for writing @Former-Member

I've gotta go to bed now, nighty night.

Hello Everybody @Shaz51 @PeppiPatty @Kurra

Glad you had a good day @Former-Member

and love @utopia's cheek re Tshirts.

I am so pleased with myself as I managed to work out how to link the wifi and printer .. and now have printed tix for New Years Day. Yay one day I will get a mobile ..

New Years Eve looks pretty solo .. unless invites fall from the air .. but I am ok with that ..

as son is off to girlfriends place.

@Former-Member That was a big share... but given the context of forum and supportive relationships you have developed .. I wouldnt call it an over share ..

I cant imagine what you have gone through with your son telling you to do things like that... There was a time when such things never occurred to kids .. these are difficult times for young adults to negotiate ..despite all the tek stuff and material prosperity.

@Former-Member I've had different bullies who were peers apologise .. but i could not join their gang ..

or ... get into what they were doing ..

I went my own way .. left home .. . I guess I felt it was time to move on ... I was 16 and got a bedsit .. very practical ..had been earning for years ..I dont regret most of my decisions .. because they were logical from my standpoint.

Yes I think CONFUSION and stockholm syndrome type behaviour go along together ..I wonder if some of the attachment theory stuff might explain your daughter's struggle .. it eems to fit .. and for emotion regulation the hand brain of Dan Siegal is really brilliant at explaining the relation between the limbic system .. high arousal states .. and the development of frontal cortex and executive control ..

Anyway ..It really helped me to read it as it was a description of me flipping my lid in the sacristy .. I had a lot of control but when I blow I blow .. and I guess my choir community and I are working through that ... if I am still in that choir ..

but I dont feel ashamed .. I blew .. but as far as I can remember .. I didnt say things that were not true .. did not swear (too much) and I didnt abuse anyone .. or be sacriligious but the heat was switched way up high .. so was the energy of all the music we were singing .. I swore in quiet to the lady who stayed with me .. but that was actually wind down mode .. Anyway .. I can only pick myself and continue .. and see what happens later .. there had been many provocations and I had called the Leader of the Community the week before trying to establish contact .. but never got through ..

I dont see anger in of itself as bad .. I have gotten in as much trouble for being lady-like .. cos of female rivalry and bitchiness .. than shooting straight from the hip. maybe I am wrong .. but I absorb and absorb .. and I say please dont do that .. a few times .. and then I blow .. so it is a bit like dont stand on the tiger's tail. pay your respects and dont bait it.

Mostly I am slow to anger .. and I certainly prefer it when my life is gently rolling along and I dont feel anger rise up and hurt my neck .. I have lived like that for many 6-12 month periods .. I dont remember being angry at all as a child or even as a teen .. it was after I returned from overseas and started therapies .. that I learned about the importance of anger .. I didnt get it really the first time .. but after a few years of primal .. I tapped into my feelings pretty deeply. so then I tried to model and teach .. safe expression of anger .. that may have confused people about my motives .. but mostly I dont like anger as I had to manage my brother.

Another man who wanted to marry me .. apologised after a few years and admitted that he did all the things that I had said had upset me .. I knew he was not right for me .. cos he did not take my neck issue seriously ..and I liked him "as a friend" .. he came from a generation where "as a friend" was a put down .. so it just seems that negotiating relationships is work .. I put my foot here .. and they put their foot

.....there .. and its a dance.

Yeah it was an overshare @Appleblossom but I figured I'd edit it tomorrow. Not for me but my boys sake.

Ive been threatening to write a response to my drama last night to you and all. I'm not sure I can do the heavy emotion for that just yet. It's all still raw but I've been distracted all day which helped. But thank you for all your responses even after I went off. They all helped cry me to sleep without SH. And I cried which I haven't been able to do for two months.