not feeling good

I hear you @BlueBay - it's all too much for you

I have to go out now - but I can read what you are writing on my phone - just set up up so I don't get emails and can't log-in

Take care of yourself - you know your moods are bleak and you are exhausted and fed up but it will go away

So - you can't answer but I can read - what do you really have to do today? It's your day - your life - and the only day you can live in right now and the only life you have - however it pans out

You aren't alone - there's a bunch of us caring right now

I'll catch up later -

Dec

@Owlunar @Gazza75 @Former-Member I’m laying on my bed. I don’t want to do anything anymore

I’m fed up

I’m so dam angry

I want to curl up and go away

I just want time to myself

I so want to sh right now

Hi @BlueBay I am so sorry to hear about how heavy you're feeling and that the thoughts of self-harm are so present. It's really important now whilst sitting with this distress that you engage in some of your 1:1 supports such as SCBS (1300 659 467) or Lifeline (13 11 14). It's super important you use a service that can properly work through these thoughts with you and provide you appropriate support

Hi @BlueBay , theres nothing wrong with not wanting to do anything for a while. I think you deserve some time out to gather yourself. You've been through a rough time and shouldn't be so hard on yourself. Are you still having people round for dinner? Please don't sh, it's not going to make you feel better.

You are so brave and a good person and will get through this. Keep reaching out for help.

@Gazza75 @Former-Member @Owlunar

Don’t worry I haven’t sh.

I’m tired from feeling so dark place

my kids are all home tonight for dinner

I’m sorry about my posts

I’m not dealing with my stuff too good

csnt evrn wrute properly

@BlueBay, i'm glad your ok. The dark place will recede eventually. I'm glad all your kids will be home for dinner with you. I think your dealing with your stuffs pretty well BlueBay, I know I wouldn't be handling it with the grace and dignity that you have. The fact that your reaching out here shows that you are resilient and strong and want to get through it. You should be proud of that.

Thanks @Gazza75 but I’m never proud of myself.

My bloody husband was meant to close our home loan insurance because we are struggling financially. But no he “forgot “ to cancel it, so tiday they took out $94 twice. So when my pay goes in tomorrow we’ll be $200. Before we even start to pay our bills. I’m so f####g annoyed. Oh well looks like another fortnight of no psy.

I may as well disappear because everyone relies on me.

I csnt fo this. If it’s not one thing it’s znither.$200 is a lot of money.

@Owlunar I know you know what I’m going through.

@BlueBay, you may not be, but, that might be something to work on and consider. We are often are own worst critics. It seems to me you have accomplished quite a bit in your life and you have been dealt a pretty rough hand.

Maybe you can call the bank about the insurance and explain to them that you are struggling financially. It's the truth and they tend to be more understanding about issues like that these days. $200 is definitely a lot of money.

It seems like a struggle for you to go a fortnight without some assistance from a psych. As far as I can tell you are taking steps to help yourself and your family. I think holding on like you are is far better than disapearing. I think you would leave a big hole in a lot of peoples hearts and minds if you did that.

Thankyou @Gazza75 you are so kind.❤️

I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your post.

I feel thst niw im in my 50’s I should be better. I should be able to cope.

I feel my life is now over.

I don’t think anyone would miss me.

I so need a break from life

I just want to cry

Hey @BlueBay,

I can hear how distressing things are today and that you just want a break from these painful emotions. You mention feeling no one would miss you. I would really encourage you if you are worried about your safety or need some counselling support to reach out to:

Lifeline 13 11 14

Suicide Callback Service 1300 659 467

Take care of yourself,

Tortoiseshell