not feeling good

Hi @Shaz51 I only have a medication for pain. Hopefully seeing the gastroenterologist today.

Not having a good day tiday. Tears are glowing feeely down my face.

Trying to wirk our why. Does there have to be a reason? I’m feeling like everything is my fault.

In between writing this I had to see my psych. For the first time he has seen me in tears. I could hardly talk to him because I was crying so much. We spoke about me truly wanting g to change. He gave me some ideas of using ice or a punching bag to hrlp with my anger. He is increasing my anti depressant.

After been in there for 10 mins he asked how I was feeling. I had calmed down by then.

I better go to group I’ll chst later.

@Razzle @Former-Member @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope xxx

Hi my friends 😊

@Shaz51 @Razzle @Former-Member @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope @Owlunar

the gastroenterologist came in and spoke to me about the procedure. He wants me to stsy on the meds he prescribed and drop it back to one tablet in a few weeks. He said the hernia is slight so nit to worry

if psin comes back go to my gp or if he wants to he can refer me to him.

Also results of biopsy came back sll good

Im going to lose some weight as I know it’s not good for my gut. I seem to hsve put it around my mid section since menopause.

Leaving tomorrow has led to some negative thoughts earlier.

Guilt feeling if being in here

guilt feeling if not able to wirk more

trying to out these thoughts away.

We talked in group about discharge and how we need to ease into life again. She said it’s nit good to go straight back into doing the same things line before. I told her I have no choice I have to go bs k to wirk next Tuesday. I don’t have a say when we’re struggling financially. I would love to ease myself into wirk but just csnt. For me it feels like my life will be how it was before being admitted.

I need to chsnge my days so I can be on my own fir at least 30 mins a day. I need to have time to myself. The psychologist said this is very important otherwise anger will creep in and I’ll breakdiwn again. She is so true.

Hoping your night is going well.

❤️❤️❤️

Morning @Shaz51 @Razzle @Former-Member @Zoe7 @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope and others reading this -

I’m all packed and ready to leave hospital. This admission has made me realise that I can’t syop my meds. It was a big mistake that I’ve learnt. I joined groups and met some beautiful people who are struggling. It made me realise that even though my issues are tough there are some in here eith huge issues. One man in particular buying a property while on a high with his bipolar snd niw in a very low state realising what a huge mistake he’s done. He said he was very close to ending his life. Thsts just one example of the many stories I’ve heard. I’ve learnt that I need time to myself. Even if it’s only 15 mins walk just some time fir me.

I kniw I’m going bsvk to a chaotic house and work next week. Hopefully things at home will settle down soon.

Good morning @BlueBay and thanks for your uplifting update.

It is so true that no matter how desperate things may sometimes feel, there are always others who are worse off. Realising this does not remove our personal hardships, but it does help put things into perspective. And we are never alone, there are always others walking that path with you.

I'm glad the meds issue is all sorted and that you are now accepting of the need to remain on them.

Its unfortunate that your financial situation requires that you return to work on Tuesday. Ideally you'd have another week off. But you sound like you're in a pretty good place right now, far better than you were.

I'm feeling very optimistic for you @BlueBay .

Sherry 💜

Thanks @Former-Member

I’m feeling a bit overwhelmed and tired st the moment and need to slow down.

That is all sounding a bit more positive than it was when you went into hospital @BlueBay - lovely to hear Hon

Only been home today snd I’m already over it. Wish I was back in my own room. Hubby saying the most stupidest comments. I’m trying very hard to not let his comments get to me.

And another thing- I work eith a friend of mine. Well I thought she was my friend. While in hospital she never once called or text me. And tiday when I had to go to wirk yo get medication pack she only said hi and thst was it. No “how are you going or glad you’re home”. Nothing. I felt she didn’t care.

If the situation was opposite I would have text her a few times. And even called in for a coffee. But I’m a caring person. I guess she’s not.

So much for a friend. I feel if I had a physical issue it would be a totally different story.

@Former-Member @Shaz51 @Razzle @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope

@BlueBay . Glad you’re home, not so glad that it’s not smooth sailing.

As for you not having a “physical” issue - how can it not be?? You were physically in pain, migraines aren’t a walk in the park, back pain, hip pain, stomach pain are all physical pain - and mental health problems are the biggest

pain of all because they are so complex and freaken hard to treat.

If your husband isn’t being helpful at the moment, you need to tell him now. Straight out tell him his comments aren’t helpful and he needs to stop. You left hospital in a good place

mentally, you don’t need him to unravel all your hard work.

I really hope you can enjoy this weekend, it’s going to be warm (well, it is here) so perfect weather to get out

of the house.

Take care @BlueBay ❤️❤️

Hi @BlueBay I'm sorry you haven't felt supported by hubby.

Dealing with your own mental health is hard. Not feeling supported by others can add to the pressure. Espscially when we are hoping for that supoort.

As much as we might think we know how best to deal with a situation, everyone's experience is different. I hope you find a solution that is best for you @BlueBay .

Take care all, thecolourblue

@Razzle @Zoe7 @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7 @Owlunar

Today is a really bad day.

Bank account is zero actually negative

I can’t think my stomach hurts

hubby has no idea

I have to tell him

it’s this bad because I got paid this week but obviously I didn’t have enough sick leave so got $500 less in my normal pay

I feel sick

it would be better for the whole family if I just left and ended it all

this is crazy