not feeling good

❤️ @BlueBay

Thankyou @Faith-and-Hope @Shaz51 ❤️❤️

I so hate my dictir and his stupid boundaries. Can only see him fortnightly fir my mentsl health.

I rang him this mirning and he said I can call him this afternoon but he is cancelling my 2pm appt because it’s nit in the fortnightly visit. Which is next week.

Why does he put boundaries. Why do I need it.

Becayse it’s me thst abuses and NEEDS my dictir. I need him to talk to and listen to me.

It’s all my fault. I’m to blame with this stupid borderline personality disorder.

I so f...... hste it.

Anger at the moment is uncontrollable. I need to lash out.

Boundaries BPD anger and everything about it and me go hand in hand.

Shdking snd anxious it just makes it worse.

Why do I have BPD?? Well maybe they got it wrong.

I just needed to talk to someone.

Sitting with you @BlueBay. I've heard you speak about your doctor before and about how supportive he is. It's tough when people we rely on become less available. I'm hearing how angry you are about this decision - is there something that helps you manage this anger? We're here to listen if you'd like to keep posting here for support. Take care BlueBay.

@BlueBay here for you

Hi @Shaz51 @Jupiter @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Owlunar @Zoe7 @Razzle

I’m close to self harming because I can’t deal with things st home.

All I can hear is hubby rant and rave about the fridge and items nit in ”the right spot”. I didn’t know there was a “right spot” in the fridge. If it’s nit the fridge it’s the pantry or cupboards where coffee mugs are.

I will never get it right. Never. I’m always in the wrong. It’s bad enough getting negativity from my mum all my life but now at home too.

I need to calm myself down otherwise self harm is on my mind.

Hey @BlueBay - gawd it's been a rough day, hasn't it? Just checking in to say we'll be sending you a quick email, but also if you'd like some support minimising those urges somehow, then you can give SCBS or LL a ring ok? Keep a look out for an email!

Suicide Call Back Service
1300 659 467 (24 hours)
On-Line counselling (24 hours)
www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au

Lifeline
13 11 14 (24/7)
Chat (7pm-Midnight)
www.lifeline.org.au

I'm here to sit with you for a while @BlueBay to give you a hug and to let you know you are free to vent your frustrations, and know I'm listening.

As @Former-Member said, it sounds like its been a difficult day for you. Did you make it to your chiro apt? And if so. has it helped your sore neck?

Do you feel like getting out of the house for a while, and take in a few deep breaths of cool evening air?

It really sounds like your hubby has OCD issues. Unfortunately I do too, so I have some sympathy for him in that regard. I hope you can understand that with ocd it really is an extremely compelling need to 'get things right'. For him this clearly includes having everything in the right spot. It is likely not something he can control, so please do not take his ranting and raving to heart.

I will be around for a while if talking would help. Please be very careful with sny self harm issues, and do not hesitate to call for immediate help if things get out of hand.

Sherry 💜

Hi @Former-Member @Former-Member

I’m watching tv and the thoughts of wanting to sh have diminished. I’ve gone into my bedroom to see Ayla asleep. And she brings me so much love. She is so cute. Can’t wait for the morning to kiss and cuddle her.

@Former-Member Whst do I do with his OCD? Just try to ignore it?

@Former-Member I’ve looked st my safety plan. Thankyou for emailing it to me.

Hello my @Former-Member , @Former-Member

@BlueBay, my darling sister , big breath , holding you

can you walk outside and take a big breath xoxo