not feeling good

@Faith-and-Hope @Owlunar @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Razzle @Zoe7

Another headache this morning. Feeling very exhausted.

Hubby left early this morning to go with his mate to a car show. Won’t be home until tonight. Boys going out. D taking Ayla to park eith her partner.

So I’m left alone. Might actually be good.

I do get angry because I never go anywhere with a friend for the whole day.

Think I need to take it easy today.

Hi lovely @Owlunar

I’m reading your post again.

I think you’re right about hospital stay. I will email my psych this week and see what he says.

My health is important whether it’s physical or mental.

I feel at the moment like I’m at the end of everything. Just nit coping.

Whst you wrote about being in a washing machine and wrung out - thst exactly how I feel. I actually explained that to my dictir snd he said it was a good analogy.

Yes I do feel wounded and the wound and scars are deep and painful.

Ive decided I won’t do the trauma sessions eith SECASA. It will be too traumatic painful snd I don’t want to feel wrecked after each session.

My psych told me thst he didn’t think I should do it.

I’m going to chst to my doctor and hubby about hospital stsy.

I hope you’re ok. I’m sorry I haven’t posted much to you or others.

Take care xxx

Hi @BlueBay

I'm really glad you are going to think about hospital - it seems to me from out here that you are really ready to collapse with the way your past trauma and the present changes are impacting you and it came out in a dramatic migraine - my feeling is - let's not let it get any worse - and you are the one who suffers -

That migraine is a warning - and for Huffnpuff - people do need to be on a drip in hospital with a migraine if they get serious enough - I had to once - first into resus and then on the drip to rehydrate me - this is not fun at all - it's a big red flag that emotionally you are totally washed out

And I know - I have those scars inside too - but for me they are scars now

And it's wise I think to keep those trauma sessions to the one therapist who knows where you are in all of that

And on a more gentle note - I know you are a little socially isolated and you would like to have outings with friends - and I think that might be because you are shy and afraid people will think you are "dumb" etc if you ask questions etc - that's the word you used and I don't think you are at all "dumb" - just shy - and maybe people just don't know you

I think you probably open up more here because it's safe - and also - as you have said yourself you feel judged. I really don't think very many people are into judging other people - mostly people are too busy worrying about themselves and how they appear

And this wears off as you get older - at least it has with me - I am more comfortable in my older skin than I was when I was more uncertain about my place in the world. People are not usually thinking about what we imagine anyway -

And I suggest you gather up your inner army and tell Huffnpuff you need to go to hospital and you know you might have to wait. Tell him other people have to go to hospital with severe migraine and you don't want to risk another one like that

I am thinking of you

Dec

Thsnkyou @Owlunar xx

my mum rang me this morning and I told her I was in hospital. She sounded concerned. She said msybe I’m doing too much and I’m stressed with d here and son moving out. She said I need to look after myself first. I felt like crying. For the first time she spoke with empathy.

I am sitting outside on my deck having a coffee listening to the birds. It’s quite fresh this mirning. I think I’ll go down the street and buy some things for dinner. Might make a veg soup. I will call my gp tomorrow morning and let him know about yesterday. I still feel a bit weird like a hangover. Bit slow and drowsy.

Are you doing much tiday?

Hi @BlueBay

That's great about your Mum being so understanding - that's a real win - so glad to hear it

Take the time to yourself and enjoy it - you have been so overwhelmed with people being about lately - something I wouldn't be to happy about myself - I am used to a quiet life

I am okay - just having a quiet day - I have been reading up for my class next Thursday - there is a lot of reading attaching and I have a bit of a headache - eyestrain - so I am thinking of keeping off the computer today -

And I will make and appointment to see my optometrist tomorrow - I know I need glasses to help me deal with the blue-screen

Enjoy your day and make plans yourself - and again - great about your Mum

Dec

Take the time to yourself and enjoy it my sister @BlueBay , you have had soo much going on lately

and that was really nice from your mum xx

it is sunny up here and verrrryyyyy hot , got the aircon on as i have a big headache / neck ache

Hello my second mum @Owlunar xxx

Thanks @Shaz51 @Owlunar

ive got another terrible headache not as bad as yesterday. I’ve taken some strong meds. I’m laying down. The boys and my d are home now. I’ve cooked a veg soup fir dinner.

My d told me tidsy thst she is confused about getting back with her partner. I told her that I would like her to see a counsellor. She agreed.

She told me tiday thst it’s not just him not helping. She said it’s was he says and does. She didn’t elaborate so I left it. I didn’t want to push her to tell me. So I think a counsellor would be good

I’m going to close my eyes for a while. Chst later. Xxxxx

Hi @Shaz51 @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Razzle @Zoe7

still got my headache.

Hubby just got home. He had a good day. But he tells me now that he’s going to dmother car show next week.

I said yo him ”I didn’t know there was another one next week”. He turns around and says “yeah there’s always two shows in a row”. So I walked off sngry. I know he doesn’t go out eith his mate very often. But I’ve never gone out fir a whole day and come home late where the whole house is clean clothes washed and dinner cooked.

I’m going to go to bed early tonight. Hoping my headache goes.

I feel horrible.

Hi everyone

@Shaz51 @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Razzle @Zoe7

home from wirk. In bed trying to rest.

My head is so sore.

Nit a quiet house. All kids are home.

Hi everyone

@Shaz51 @Owlunar @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Zoe7 @Razzle

I’m feeling not right with myself. I feel I shouldn’t be on here anymore.

Maybe I need to go away for a while

maybe come back later or stay away

I’m struggling

it’s hard to explain my feeling right this moment

I can’t think

confusion anger emotions sh snd suicude on my mind

it’s so hard st home

pls don’t reply

I just need to stsy away for a while

I’m really sorry

im hopeless pathetic