not feeling good

Spot on @utopia ❣. It's called "overwriting" @BlueBay .... you are over-writing negative self-talk with positive self-talk .... practicing it regularly, it will take hold .....

You need to heal, and make your future about your family .... and any children your children may have .... telling your abusers in your "mind's eye" that they can't have your future is giving yourself permission to live that future without them .... it's a healing path forward ....

❤️💕

@BlueBay. Sleep now. I'm holding your hand. It's comforting.

It helps you to feel safe, secure. So you can sleep now.

And I'll keep holding your hand.

@BlueBay .... pretend her face is on the cover of a magazine, and draw a moustache, beard and bushy eyebrows on her .... add some fangs and bunny ears .... go to town with it .... and when you're done, rub it all out in your mind's eye and do it again ..... ❣

Take the power of her image in your mind away from her ..... let her know she can't have your future either !!

Big hugs ❣

❤️🌹❤️🐾💋💕

I am here @BlueBay .... and I am going to punch a pillow on your behalf .... ❣

It wasn't fair what happened to you, but you don't have to go through it alone .... here with you and feeling for you so much ....

❤️❤️❤️

Aw @BlueBay

You are not a bad person and you haven't done anything to deserve the way you are feeling

Otherwise - all of us have done something wrong because we all feel bad at times

Hold on to this - your mother did something really bad - really really bad - not you

I have to hit the sack myself - but I will be thinking of you

Dec

Still here with you @BlueBay .... 💜

Hello @BlueBay

If you are a bad person then so am I as I have had many tragedies, losses, abandonment by family, abuse and grief.

I still bear mental scars my friend but letting go in my life experience is a process. What helped me to let go was to over time practice placing my thoughts and focus off my pain and past hurts/losses and onto something else that took my whole concentration. So instead of thinking on the pain - I would distract my mind from it and from the abuse my mothers and others inflicted. I would bring my focus back for example on the love of my husband, word puzzles, reading and crafts that were meditative for me which helped block out the painful emotions also. I also put my focus and energy into volunteer work. Things like that. Setting goals within my limitations and the do my best to fulfill them - all which helped to move my thoughts off the pain and onto something else. It takes time and practice. Baby steps.

It wasn't a sudden mental thought of "I will let go of this". It was a process of not placing my thoughts and focus on the rejection, past, abuse and pain but refocusing it on the love around me or on something else good, no matter how small, And it took awhile to train myself to do this. It's living in the moment looking to a better future with hope and not looking back.

Another thing that helps me to let go of the pain is talking it over with my husband or a trusted friend and following any advice given as I know they seek my welfare.

Thats what helps me move forward. It's not so much the pain or mental scars go forever, it's just learning to move on with life and making the most of it "without letting the pain take over". And doing the above helps towards that.

i have bad days like anyone else but soon reset my focus on those they love me now and what I find fulfilling to do. It may be something as simple as cross stitch or bingo - but it takes my mind off myself, my pain. Helping others can help with this also.

Do you enjoy spending time with your adult children? Do you find joy in them? I noticed your lovely avatar, do you love walking on the beach as I do? Does this help you to relax? I use to find myself crying all the time when menopausal. Do you think that could be making you feel emotional as well? Sending lots of love to you my friend ad am here for you always xxxx

I'm here @BlueBay. I haven't gone anywhere. I'm lying right next to you, holding your hand. Can you feel my hand?

I can hear the breeze rustling through the trees outside your window. Can you hear it?

It's quite gentle and soothing. Almost like a lullabye being sung to us. Helping us to relax and breathe gently.

I'm going to stay holding your hand. I'm not going anywhere.

We can just stay here together and focus on our breathe. Breathing in .... and breathing out.... not thinking of anything..... just listening to the breeze and breathing.....

I'm going to keep holding your hand all night. Even while you sleep I will be right beside you.

You are safe and warm here. The breeze is gently blowing outside the window. Just you and me and breathing.

Calming.......soothing....breathing.....