not feeling good

@BlueBay. No wonder you are exhausted. That sounded like a very intense but very important session. Your therapist sounds like she really understands and will help you.

Anger is not a bad emotion. It can be therapeutic to feel the anger andget it out.

Sometimes I punch a pillow or scream at a pillow (the pillow is the person I'm angry at).

Knitting might be a good calming activity for you this afternoon.

Well done.

Thanks @Zoe7

I'm so drained I can't think. My body aches from all the tightness I had in my body while sobbing.

I read you had a fall. I hope you're not in too much pain. Take care my friend. Thinking of you. Xx

Thsnks @utopia

I'm sitting here holding my knitting deciding whether I should just do some or not. If I don't I'll start to ruminate so I better knit a little. Xx

Sessions like that are so draining @BlueBay. Self-care is your priority for the rest of the day - knitting, sleeping, whatever you csn do to look after yourself.

Yes I had a fall and am still in a lot of pain - the xray and CT scan showed several problems but thankfully no fracture - pain meds are helping a little but not taking all the aches and pains away - physio booked for next Wednesday.

Could you have a nice warm bath this afternoon to help with the body aches -then maybe a sleep after that?

Sounds like a good plan @Zoe7

think I'll go and sleep for a while. And I need to start taking my meds agsin. My psychologist said it's not good to stop like I have as it will cause an even worse down crash and I will feel a whole lot worse. But you snd I know it's my self sabotage that's why I do it. So back on my meds.

Take care @Zoe7 it will take time. But good no fracture. Wish I could take away all the pain for you xx

Yes we both know it is you self-sabotaging not taking your meds Hon - please look after yourself by taking your meds - even when you don't think they are helping they are @BlueBay - no-one wants to see you crash at all my beautiful yellow flower

I hope a sleep helps with some of those feewlings from your session - love and hugs for you

No wonder you are exhausted @BlueBay

please look after yourself by taking your meds - even when you don't think they are helping they are my sister , I agree with @Zoe7 xoxoxox

sending you tending hugs @Zoe7, @BlueBay

You know my sis @Shaz51

I feel so emotional right now and don't know why.

I just wanted to stop all my meds because I was sick of taking them. I wanted to feel normal. I know sometimes we have to take meds fir our health. But I got to s point where I thought "stuff all this I'm stopping my meds". But I do know I need to take them. It's my way of hurting myself. Punishing myself.

How are you and your hubby?

Did your infection clear up?

I couldn't stay away from here because I miss everyone xxxx

Thanks @Former-Member

you know a big part of me is scared. Scared to let go and let this caring psychologist help me heal. I have to trust her. I keep thinking what if she leaves me. She can't abandon me. That's my thinking at the moment. I know and can see she genuinely wants to help me. Fir the first time in 8 years I have found the right therapist. I went through 4 different ones. I'm still feeling a bit fragile tonight. I am still crying at times for my child snd sbuse. It's so overwhelming.

i feel like a broken child. Broken in pieces like a jigsaw puzzle. And niw I have to find all the pieces and put altogether. But some pieces are hard to find and put together.

Gosh I'm angry so damn sngry. I feel destructive agsin. I need to stop. I need to breathe and calm down. Trouble with me is I internalise my anger inwards. Gosh I'm a mess.

Sorry @Former-Member this is a long post.

BB xx