not feeling good

@Shaz51 I went back to the doctors and he has put me on cortisone tablets but this time for a week and reducing the amount each day.

I am okay. Just need a good night sleep. How are you going?

Hello @BlueBay, i have been wondering how you are tonight my friend

I am feeling tired , a good night sleep will fix that i hope

Hubby has been getting pains today like kidney stones today , hope it does not get worse

Hey @Former-Member

Your post makes me feel pretty good too - I just had to look all the up -

My favourite animal is a domestic short-hair cat - I have a pic of her - I have photoboxed it for privacy

Here she is

She is so cute and snugly - so here I call her Snugly - and she is getting on in years - so she is pretty clever too

I woke up a couple of nights back and she seemed to be lying underneath me - but I might have dreamed this - and I shook her at bit and called her name - then a bit harder - and the third shake and she meowed at me - I think I might have dreamed some of this because I wasn't scared - or maybe I was scared to be scared - but I was so glad to hear that resentful comment

When it comes to David Attenborough's animals I love the pangulin - it really is a cute little fellow -

What made you pick the name Diprodoton? I picked my name because I have lived through several decades - like my cat - I am getting long in the tooth

Dec

Morning @Shaz51

Today is another day, the sun is out and I am doing okay. That's not good about your husband, hope it's not kidney stones and the pain doesn't get worse.

Take it easy both of you. xxxooo

Hi @Decadian@Shaz51@Former-Member@utopia@Change123@Faith-and-Hope@Former-Member@NikNik

For the first time today I have been reflecting back and comparing my sessions with my old therapist that I had for 5 yrs and this new one who is a lady.

I have only seen "J" four times now and I am so amazed at how different they work. For the first time in 5 yrs I have been 'allowed' to talk openly and honestly about my mum and dad but especially my mum and how narcissitic she is. I have cried, I have had melt downs but my new psychologist is there for me.

She hasn't walked out like my old therapist, she doesn't say to me 'oh we know you're mum is a bitch' and cut me off. Or when I cry she sits and listens to me.

This is so important in therapy - to be listened, to feel you are human and yes you do go through different stages of emotions at times. And isn't it their (psychologists/therapist) job to help me, to sit and listen.

I will bring this up with "J" and tell her about my other therapist walking out and how I felt. Because i am sure that this has held me back.

But now I am with the right person and I am so glad that i have a female who is on the same page as me. Who understands and is gentle but gives me answers that i can see.

hello @BlueBay xx

you wrote -- But now I am with the right person and I am so glad that i have a female who is on the same page as me. Who understands and is gentle but gives me answers that i can see.

that is good @BlueBay xx

and also People come in our lives at the right time , the right moment in life

you have grown my friend , it was time for someone to help you xx

and thank you for your comment about hubby

Hi @Shaz51@BlueBay

Shaz sorry to hear of your father.

@BlueBay

I'm really happy for you, you are getting somewhere and have taken some steps on the road to recovery - very proud of you!

I'm slowly sliding down into a not so good place, mainly depression from all the crap we have endured in the past week from bitch sister inlaw. I'm coping but just feeling really really sad. Maybe its normal for me to feel like this after what she has put us through? I am very very exhausted mentally, emotionally and physcially and have not slept well all this week or eaten properly as my stomache has just been in one know. I'm ok but just trying to let some of it out so I dont slide any further down (its onlys starting but I recognise the signs) so I'm trying to stop it from going any further. I'm trying not to think of the hurtful things said to me as well and the fact that I will be getting demonized for something I didnt do - maybe this is karma I'm getting the behaviour that maybe I had years and years ago but I know deep inside that I was never this bad, even my partner said this has given delusional a whole new meaning with what she has done. Sorry I know I'm ranting and I'm quite conscious of it but I dont want to bottle it up.

If anyone can suggest a more healthy way to deal with this please let me know. For now I'm just being nice to myself, tonight I plan to have some junk food for tea which we hardly do and have a good strong brandy and early night.

Thanks - feel a bit better

Hi @BlueBay

I am sure you will find your way out of the maze you have been in when you are allowed to talk about your mother - having had just such a mother and knowing how it screws people up

You need to talk about it and "get it out of your mouth" - just as you would if you had eaten something bad. If you ate bad fish and didn't throw up it could destroy you - same as having had so much of your bad mother - and that former psychologist

Getting up and walking out of the room if you cried!!!!!!! Saying - yes we know your mother is a bitch!!!!!!

Ah - that still makes me as mad as a snake -

Nothing is finite when it comes to psychotherapy - there are nothing is certain - we all have to battle with issues and need to have freedom to talk about them with someone who can help - and nothing is black and white and nothing is ever finished until the client says something like

"I am fed up with all of this - I am tired of thinking about it - I am tired of talking about it - I want to move onto something else"

It has to be in your time and your new psychologist sounds like the person who can get you to that point

I am so happy for you

Dec

Hi @Change123

Feel free to rant away - that's what we are here for and we are really good at listening to it

It is perfectly normal to feel bad when someone rats on you in anyway - and it is unpleasant - we can live without toxic people and better if we put as much space as possible between ourselves as them and that is hard with family members

I have a sister like that - I call her TS - Toxic Sister - I can't believe what she is capable of and I would like it if she respected bad dates - but she is still clearing up issues regarding our parents estate and I had to have a series of documents posted between us and several text messages between the anniversaries of their deaths last week

And I can't help but wonder why she does this - is she looking for a way to patch things up between us? I don't know but I don't trust her at all - and like you with your bitch SIL - I need to rant and run off at the mouth sometimes

And here we know you are not being paranoid or delusional because some of us have the same stuff and know this happens in families

Rant away Change - you can do this here and be in good company - the best company actually

Dec