not feeling good

Hi @Zoe7

Sleep is so important. But I'm going from lack of sleep to far too much sleep!!!

Just had dinner and waiting for my daughter and her boyfriend to come over so we can have a birthday cake for her.

I phoned the local CAT team this afternoon explaining to them of my concern of how i am feeling. They said they couldn't say or do much because i am under a private consultant psych. But that if i felt unwell or not coping I could go to the local hospital where I will have to wait to see a clinician. And even then he said they may not even change my meds. He said the type of med i have been given is one that the public hospital dont give out. Great so that is making me even feel more anxious as to why my psych gave me this med.

He was really understanding but unfortunately couldn't help me.

OMG i am stuffed; it's like i can't do very much at all because i am so tired, yawning away.

I understand how you must be feeling not getting much sleep at all. Are you enjoying the cricket. I wish i could curl up in bed right now and sleep but i have to wait for my daughter.

How on earth am i supposed to go to work on wednesday if i can't get up at a reasonable time in the morning. And then feel like a wreck the whole day. i am starting to stress.

chat again later, unless i am asleep!!!

Struggled to get up and go to my GP. One look at me and he knew I wasn't right. I told him i am so exhausted, weak and can't get up in the mornings. He said i def have the side effects of this new med that my pyusch has put me on. but he can't do much without his permission. the only thing i can do is call my psych or stop it altogether. but if i stop it i will feel quite bad for a few days.

so i called my psych and he is not in until next wednesdasy. i explained to the receptionist and she will get another psych who i have seen before to call me. i want to stop it but need to speak with them first.

my GP has given me the next two days off work because of the way i am at the moment.

i feel like stopping all meds and trying to clear my head with no meds. i am tired of trying all sorts of meds, tired of being exhausted all the time. supposed to give me energy but it's done nothing.

i am so angry with my psych but i can't do anything at the moment.

home alone, don't know what to do except sleep, but don't want to sleep too much becaue it will wreck my sleep tonight.

no housework today, no nothing. might sit and draw. or cry, or hit punch or kick something. sharp items are away.

Morning @BlueBay

After the crazyness of the christmas period I also had a sore throat plus swollen glands, tightness in chest and slight fever. I believe it was just my body being able to relax after I finally got some sleep and stopped a bit. It is really easy when we are not feeling good mentally to become susceptible to physical ailments also. But I am definitely not a doctor and if you are concerned or get worse please see a GP.

I was pleased to see you did get some sleep yesterday.The tiredness doesn't go away straight away. Don't worry that you have gone fropm no sleep to too much sleep - you need it!

I'm sorry the local CAT team couldn't help you. Don't worry about the meds - often it is a funding or supplier aligned issue - talk to you psych when you can about your meds.

Are you able to take a few more days off work? If you are then rest and don't stress about the extra time off. If you aren't then I'm here to help you get through the next few days. You have got through the last few days and that shows inner strength and fight. Proud of you my friend. You'll get there - I'm here with you.

@BlueBay

Just saw your new post (after I had sent the previous one). Be back in a few minutes - chat soon

Hi @Zoe7

I have the next two days off work. Don't know if they will be angry but i really don't care anymore. if they want to sack me they can. i really dont care. i need to rest, sleep, eat a little if i can and do not much.

thank you for being here for me, i truly am grateful for your support. Hope you are feeling better now. I thinnk it's also this stupid weather we're having (in Vic) one day hot the next cold. Any wonder we get sick.

i have so much i want to do but physically can't so i am not going to do any of it.

@Zoe7

my psych just rang me, he told me to stop my new medication. i just want to stop everything, i really don't care about anything anymore. i am over fighting this war inside my head, this turmoil, the anxiety, the depression, the childhood abuse. i am over it ALL.

i don't care anymore about anyone or anything. i am just so over it all.

i have no energy to care for anything anymore.

i am sorry to bother you

@BlueBay That's great that you have the next two days off - and it's even better that you managed to get yourself going and went to your GP- very positive step my friend

Changing meds does knock you around sometimes - and sometimes it does feel like you are getting worse and not better. I recently had mine changed and I got so much worse before I started feeling any better - it took a few weeks and it was a really rough few weeks. Hang in there until you hear from someone and then see where to go from there.

Make sure you do eat - anything is better than nothing! and don't forget to drink lots of water - especially when the weather is up and down - heat will affect your hydration levels and when it gets colder you think you don't need as much water but your body may still be having the aftereffects from the heat also.

Don't stress about the physical things you want to do - try to do one thing at a time - but only if you have the energy -start with something small then rest afterwards. I was only capable of doing small things for a very limited amount of time - then I tried to do too much at once and could't move properly for days - bad move on my part - did teach me a lesson though: listen to my GP!!!

OK - Just got your new message - scrap all that and tell me what you can do today that you love to do - did you mention earlier drawing?

@BlueBay

And you are not bothering me at all - I'm here to walk this with you - you can do it - I believe in you my friend

@Zoe7

I have to go to work to give them my certificate - don't want to do that or go there

My son wants me to go for a small walk and coffee - dont want to do that either, but i will prob have to seen as he is home

i am sorry i have no 'happy' hormones in me today; no feeling of good or anything.

yeah i could draw, ok maybe i will go for that walk now. oh i don't know. i can't decide. just want to hide away on my bed.

maybe i shld ring the CAT team, they're not going to help me are they;

i am so hopeless, nothing ever works out for me; nothing is ever good for me; it's all crap