not feeling good

Hi @BlueBay

It's good that you are making a new start with your new psyche - it seems that most people have the idea that your old psyche was not doing his best for you and this new guy seems to be on the ball - I am glad you made that choice

I know BPD is hard to live with - I know I have told a couple of people that my therapist thinks my son had BPD - but I thought I would pass on to you something that I heard on Dr Phil last week

He told a guest and her family that MI is a condition that needs to be managed with the right medication and therapy - and it can be managed but not cured -

I have to think about my chronic back pain that way - I have for 22 years now - I know it will never go away

It's the same with BDP - you do need to change your thoughts about it - but mostly that this will be with you - but it will improve - it will not always be so bad - and to me it seems as if this new psyche has the right idea for you - it is a mood disorder and made worse by hormonal upheaval - and it will take time to peel back the layers

We all wish the best for you - take it easy - you will have a longer time in hospital this time - it was such bad management that you were tipped out into the cold for Christmas - this time you have the time to get yourself to a place where things will not be so hard for you

I think of you a lot - it is hard to know that there is something difficult to manage for a long time to come - I know this - but it can be done

Hugs - Dec

@BlueBay

Hi @BlueBay

I'm concerned - what happened when you scratched your arm that made you walk out of the class?

Was this just one more thing? It sounds as if you are really battling with anything about to set you off

Did you get to talk to the staff about how you felt - I really care what happens to you

Dec

Oh @BlueBay

I get it - talking about decluttering right now was a bit too much - when you are packing - and I can see now why you freeze just thinking about doing it.

Is it your mother's stuff that set you off - like - getting rid of that is getting rid of your mother or something -

You do need to get her out of your hair - of course you feel attached to your own stuff - we all need keepsakes for the memories they hold - but your mother's stuff - no - you need to get rid of that - it's like her hooks holding your back and making you emotional

Yes - please tell the staff - and let them know how triggered you were - and yes - you need time to yourself right now - if the groups are too much you need to tell the staff that - I think the groups are important enough for you to let them know that it is too much for you right now rather than just not go

Actually right now I could lie down on my bed and would like a tree outside that I could see and just lie there and look at the tree - actually there is a lovely tree I can see from my room but not from my bed -

I'm just sore today - I am seeing my doctor later which is good - there is too much pain because I did a lot of clearing up in my home yesterday and overdid - ah - why do I overdo things? No need to answer that - just enjoy looking at the tree for me as well as yourself

Let the staff know how you are feeling

Dec

@BlueBay

Thinking of you BB... and still sitting on your shoulder...

Zoe xxx