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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

12926 replies

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In response to: not feeling good

oceangirlSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Promise me you will keep yourself safe @BlueBay.

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I will try @oceangirl. I'm so tired I just want to close my eyes.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

oceangirlSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Do whatever makes you feel better @BlueBay. Do they have supper- you could try to have something to eat and perhaps take a warm shower- it may help settle you for the night. I just had some peaches and custard and I might go make a cup of tea.

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@oceangirl think I'll try to sleep. Not sure if it will work.
Goodnight my friend xxoo

In response to: Re: not feeling good

oceangirlSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay I hope you have a good night sleep. I'll be heading off soon. I am catching up with a friend tomorrow. Take care my beautiful friend xox

In response to: Re: not feeling good

OwlunarSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @oceangirl

It's been a while but I have seen you around lately

We all take time out now and again - which is healthy - I hope you were well and it was okay - but maybe this was not the case

It's good to see you again

Dec

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @oceangirl
Sleep was terrible woke up quite a few times. Had an afternoon nap today but still feeling flat. I've been knitting baby stuff fir a friends daughter in law. See my new psych tomo I have to tell him my decision- to go with him and not my reg psych. I want to try someone new and he seems good.
How was your day?
It's getting cold. I'm laying down on my bed. Better get up and go for dinner. Hope it's nice dinner tonight.
You know hsving bpd is really difficult. It's not easy to change ways of thinking and behaving. It's so easy to just stay this way than to change because that's unknown and scary. Does that make sense.
Take care xxxooo

In response to: Re: not feeling good

oceangirlSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @BlueBay

Great to hear from you. That's lovely you are knitting something for your friends baby. You are a beautiful person bluebay.

My sleep was not the best either last night but I did manage about 5 to 6 hours sleep. I caught up with my friend for lunch and it was lovely to see her again. I am feeling a bit tired now and anxious but otherwise good. I am seeing my doctors- Wednesday, Thursday & Friday this week.

Its a bit cool her tonight but not too bad, I have the sliding doors open to get in some fresh air. I hope your dinner was nice. I'm only having something light for dinner.

I understand your struggle around BPD but I believe its more trauma based and sometimes people are misdiagnosis with this. Just remember you are not your diagnosis. What you say makes perfect sense- just try to make small changes and try to be consistent with those changes.

Let me know how you get on tomorrow with your new Doctor!!!

In response to: Re: not feeling good

oceangirlSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @Owlunar

It is good to hear from you. How are you?

I was in hospital for four weeks- I was discharged about two weeks, so really only recently. I have been trying to keep up some routine since leaving hospital. I am bit tired tonight but otherwise good. Hope to catch up with you again soon.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

OwlunarSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @oceangirl

I am mostly okay - just having a slow start today - yesterday I did a lot of stuff around my place - there was a lot of paper - imagine how much paper one person has come into their home - and I am just one person - I wonder what it is like for a whole family

Four weeks in hospital - wow - that's quite a long time - I hope you are feeling the benefit - though it is a culture shock to get back to the ordinary life

And start your routine again - after having meals prepared etc - I remember even when I went into hospital for a few days at a time I had to start from scratch and catch up with what had not been attended to in my absence

All the rest - I hope you get back to the best possible as soon as possible

Dec

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