not feeling good

Ok, touch base with us tomorrow if you feel up to.

I just want to say @BlueBay that it's ok for young adult children to venture away from the nest - it's only natural, particularly when they have a partner. There may be some tension between your hubby and your daughter, but from what you've mentioned in the past, it seems that you're close with your daughter. You can stay connected with her as long as you nurture that relationship - which it sounds like you do.

Hope you get some good rest tonight.

CherryBomb

Early night tonight @Former-Member xx

hello @BlueBay, thinking of you lots my friend

I won't be far behind you @Shaz51

Hope you sleep well....

Hi @CherryBomb

I am worried. When she met this guy he was working and seemed ok. After a few weeks he had a fight with his alcoholic mum so he moved in with us. But his anxiety got worse because my daughter was working late and he couldn't handle sitting around at our place waiting for her so after about a month he decided he would leave our house and move back to his mums. My daughter loves him so much and he loves her too. But since movingn back to his house he hasn't worked because of his really high anxiety. He then had to have surgery, then he had the flu - so now it's been prob 2 months that he hasn't come over here. We haven't seen him at all. My daughter goes over to his house every single night and will come back in the morning. And even on weekends he doesn't come over. My husband is getting pretty annoyued saying oh why doesn't he come over; it's stupid he could just come over. But I try to keep the peace and say well he has anxiety maybe he can't face us after he left our place. I don't know.

All i know is that my daughter is happy and he is too. They are now talking about moving in together and renting a place Which will be good for her and him to see if they can be together 24/7. But again my hubby is worried that we won't see her anymore.

I said to my daughter this morning when is he coming over, he is welcome here anytime for dinner. But she told me that he is very anxious about coming over because he doesn't work at the moment and we will judge him. i told her we won't do that, we don't judge people. so i don't know what is going on, what will happen.

all i know is that i love my daughter so so much and i don't want her to get hurt again by a guy who may be taking advantage of her. But then again she is 24, she is old enough to move out and live on her own.

I know we can't change things for them or fix things for them; our kids will eventually move out; I really think it's time that they all move out. It's been hard having mother in law with us for 20 yrs, growing up three children to now adults who are all still at home. I just want some peace and quiet, just for a little while and then maybe the grand children can happen 🙂

I just can't help but worry and stress.

Good morning @CherryBomb @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Change123 @Decadian

I am okay this morning. I am sorry about last night, i don't know what got over me. I was in my own little world of self destruction and wanting to just end it all.

But reality is i don't want to end it all; i want to end all the pain and hurt i am going through. i want to wipe that away forever.

some days are tougher than others. thanks again for your support, it means a lot to me to have such beautiful people on this forum that really do care. xxxxooo

Good morning my friend @BlueBay xoxoxoxox

@BlueBay sorry I wasnt online for you last night.

Sounds like you got it together now though

I'm so glad i dont have kids, I dont think I would handle the stress and especially not being able to have time out from everything when you need it (living with you). Sounds like you and hubby havent had a lot of time alone with kids and mother in law - that can be very very stressful! You are actually coping better than you thought, you think about it:

• bpd issues
• mirena issues
• lots of physical pain
• mental health system - thats enough to send anyone over the edge!
• no time to yourself
• xmas

when you look at all that YOU ARE COPING EXTREMELY WELL! you should be proud that you are making it through every day!

@BlueBay you are stronger than you realise and an absolutely lovely person that I would be proud to call a friend.

Hi @BlueBay

I appreciated your thoughts on my son's birthay - that's tomorrow - the harder anniversary is his adoption date in two weeks - that is invariably more painful - that was the day that began with a beautiful blue and golden Melbourne summer morning and by night-time whatever they had given him in the morning was wearing off and he started screaming - yes - that day is a tough one

Your daughter - yes - that's hard too - there's a lot to be considered.

bI would not be happy if I was not seeing the young man my daughter was seeing didn't come around - that's a red flag

And there isn't much you can do about it except quietly tell her your concerns in private once - and assure her that this home will always be her home and that you will always be there for her and let her know that although you will no longer be saying anything you will always care

My dd is running through some kind of bad patch atm and is not into telling me her problems. This of course leave me free to think what I like - but at my age I have learned there is a limit of things that can happen - so as she is having a bad patch with her health I text her about that - but she has to find her way through life -

It's a concern - but your daughter is old enough to make her own decisions - my gd is the same age - and she has to make her decisions too - so I do understand - and I think we are less likely to lose them if we keep our hands off

But yeah - I am suspicious that this guy won't come around for dinner etc - that is slightly weird. Your feelings about this are perfectly natural

But as for yourself and your health - I am starting to think about starting another thread about why things are so much harder - generally - for women than they are for men - which is not true for all people - but women seem to wear it more than men - carry the load for longer and usually the heavier load. You are so tired now - what can we as woman do?

I just hope you get into hospital soon - and don't worry if you are in there over Christmas - some on has to be - at least you will be in a safe place for a hard time of year and it won't hurt your finances as much

Lots of hugs Blue

Dec

Good for you @BlueBay that you have a date for hospital. Hold on now you can do this, it's not too far away.