“I don’t need people” state of mind

Hi @creative_writer

I relate to your reply.

Maybe it is time to contemplate things for now.

I am out of the forum soon for a few hours.

I cannot add more to your informative reply and I have same /similar views on most of what you write.

Hi @creative_writer

Your story is so close to mine. I isolate. People say l should not. But l am fine and do chat to some.

The mask. I am happy to wear my mask. I have one good friend. She suffered compassion fatigue in my 8th year of issues. When l see her, i have to mask issues because supporting me was a huge emotional drain and she cannot listen anymore. It hurts her mind.

So masking my feelings with her allows me to have her friendship. l am very content. The benefit is it means l have someone to have a meal with and really, the break from my issue and talk about other things is good.

I am not sure why you do not want to wear a mask. Most people only care about themselves.

This forum we have opened up and l have not had an issue. Others outside the forum do not need to know about me because openess forms judgements that are often wrong.

So l am a bit stuck why it appears you want to open up to more people. Maybe l have that wrong.

I prefer one or two close confidants. The others are fine to have a coffee or light chat. People pushed why l isolate. When others dig and want to know about me it takes awhile to relax again.

Hi @creative_writer

Incredible because l mirror a lot of uour comments.

Re: I am grateful they have settled, I won’t say gone, because when I say that I seem to get a nasty surprise.

I am told reformed alcoholics, drug users, gamblers etc celebrate every day of reform and that daily celebration can go on for years or decades.

I know and am slowly accepting my trauma will always be with me. I have to stop protecting others because of what happened.

There is no magic pill.

During the trauma my adrenalin was so high l functioned. As the trauma reduced l felt lost. Burnt out emotionally. No drive.

My remedy is helping others. Some have it so much worst than me.

I hear you.

I still say, keep some thoughts in the tank. People can turn quickly.

I am not on social media so no one can interpret what they think l do

Hi @creative_writer

I keep saying

There is so much wisdom in what you write.

I think it is good you say trauma is in you. Now focus on controlling things.

Unrealistically high expectations. I hear you. Self imposed. Work on it maybe.

I cannot watch conspiracy things. Maybe as you say, some historic viewing etc needs a break

I cannot watch violence now

@Former-Member, at least they blur the fights in the TV show I watch. My mum can watch a lot in one day, me and my sister get tired, we sometimes go days without watching. Since we watch it in Turkish, we have to read the English subtitles.

Conspiracy theories are something, I don’t watch those

Hi @creative_writer

Glad your sister has similar viewing.

Turkish with English subtitles. Interesting.

I am going soon.

I feel you are so close to jumping over the hurdle to he more social at your pace.

I hope you take little steps.