“I don’t need people” state of mind

Hi @creative_writer

I will respond to both separately.

Last night l crashed out and forgot to say l was signing out. Sorry. And no apolgy needed from you for same. We understand each other better now.

Market. Spot on. I need to be with nice people and talk about now and tomorrow. Each time l open about past, the comments frustrate me. I know they mean well.

I need you to think about something. I think most people talk about now. I had a friend who get not get over a short term marriage that ended in divorce. We all heard it for about 8 years. His ex remarried. In the end what could anyone say? He refused to move on from the love of his life. He was.mid 20's.

I notice in life and on this forum, many are worried what other people think of them. We all have to do a degree. Many parents want the best for their children. But like their children, they also want to be accepted. Good chance people ask your parents and tell your parents how to run their family. I asked one person to stop forcing views on another family. I said if the kids end up on drugs etc, will you still help. I am sure that will be hard.

So just maybe your parents are lost what to do too, and who knows what others are saying to them.

I learnt about God in a local African church in Australia. For me, it is the belief in the word. Deep belief that what was written so long ago is so relevant now. I had to Surrender my thoughts to whatbl was reading. "Do not be anxious about ANYTHING" It clearly says Anything. It does not say do not get sad, upset, emotional, teary. It says ANXIOUS. I quickly saw the focus on those that interpreted the word as it was written. And when you feel anxious, try those words.

I do not wantbto lose you and the more we chat, it may happen, so please do not get upset if the methods l use do not work for you. For me the place of worship is like Sane. A gathering of like minded people. The power at Sane in one way is the interracting with Lived experienced people. Faith for me is not the church. It is the belief in the word above all other comments coming in. It takes great strength. But having God and the word as my stable anchor is irreplaceable. And whatever faith someone has is fine. Be it Buddha, Allah whatever.

Nose and throat. Love your diagnosis. You may need a rest.

In the heat of my 10 year issue l was at the dentist all the time with issues, etc. So our body can tell us something is wrong.

I also summarise one part by saying your parents may have done the best they thought for many reasons. Be grateful. But now you have the reigns so steer your life wisely

Hi @creative_writer

For no reason but this is shorter.

Who have you lost your honour and dignity to?

Not me. I heard a bit about you. Sounds tough. But you have my Full respect for realising there is a past, it is holding you back and l need to see that same energy or even more energy to see you move forward.

Public figures mess up. They move on.

You are not defined by your past. Life is a journey. You may have seen a bad movie. But they are not all bad. You will see another

I hope you understood my boat story.

Wind that big spinnaker up, catch the wind, move the mind forward and your parents will love to see you venture out when you are ready and see you found the correct formula for you.

You are wise! Associate with wise people.

Hi @creative_writer

I must say you do not have to do this journey alone.

Just work out what works best for you from each bit of support you get.

I see on Sane you not only have support, but you support others

Hi @creative_writer

I tried getting my friend to free financial advice. Lifeline referred a few. My friends sister was adamant "they all take your money. Keep away from them" my friends sister had no lived experience to come to that conclusion. I can only guide my friend so far.

That relates to your parents saying others just want your money. There are also helpful people.

I am hearing you.

I am with you.

I think I hear you had a major issue.

I think I hear you are making progress

I think I hear you know what to do but your mind just cannot quite jump the next hurdle and release the somewhat excruciating past.

Is that where you feel stuck?

I changed the common term "we hit a wall" to "we hit a hurdle" hurdles we can get over.

I think you have succeeded jumping so many.

Why do you think the hurdle to move forward, knowing the past was bad, is holding you back so much.

I think There will always be wise resistance moving forward after a trauma.

Why is the next step so hard?

Mine is hard but l do the best l can.

@Former-Member, I think it’s reasonable to be picky about who you work with. I’ve seen a number of mental health professionals, but not all of them were the right fit for me.

I’m feeling better now, it’s strange the thoughts have been stronger than usual. I may have been exposed to triggering content today too, I guess there is a reason why “TW” exists. I was trying to find relatability but I ended up triggering myself further. I didn’t want to feel so lonely. I’ve been experiencing the most painful type of loneliness, you know the loneliness you experience when you are surrounded by people? You gotta tread very careful with music about SA

hi @creative_writer

I read the first part and l commend you on seeing not all professionals are the right fit. But some are right at that time. Be thankful for them.

I changed listeners. You may tire of me too. I am not offended.

I understand Spiritual means different to others. I think my draw on faith may be different to you. Thank you for respecting my voice, even though it may not align with yours. This is how we grow.

I am glad you are feeling better today. I say l am feeling better now. My situation is not over and it does not take my to trigger me. I get warm. I take a seat. I watch tv in the backround. I call Lifeline. And l am aware now, something triggers the feeling. I can move my thoughts after a non judgemental vent. I hope the sane forum is allowing you similar.

I have wondered if some people are more alone by themselves or more alone in a relationship without respect and compatability. But it appears you are not alone.

I do feel less lonely with the forum at the moment.

Glad you are better.

Enjoying the chat and mutual respect.

I hope you find a method to place less empahis on the trauma so frequently

Hi @creative_writer

Sorry.

Three questions.

You do not have to answer any but l am willing to see the answers.

I hope they make you think anyway And l am sure this is not new to you.

1) What methods do you use when feeling lonely?

2) (a) What methods would you like to use and (b) what is holding you back?

3) If you were listening to someone in a similar position, what suggestions would you make so they do not feel as lonely?