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Something’s not right

Not Coping

Birdofparadise8Senior Contributor

Not Coping

Hey everyone how are you all?

@RiverSeal @Shaz51 @NatureLover @tyme @Former-Member @Eve7 @Former-Member @amber22 @Jynx @FloatingFeather

I'm not doing great at all today. I'm feeling down. I also keep beating myself up for everything and feel like I'm just failing. I need a break from everything. It's getting so hard that I don't know how to keep going anymore especially since I can't talk to anyone around me as they are leaving me or don't understand.

Hope you don’t mind me reaching out I just really need a chat and though I could come on here and vent and talk for a bit.

Thank you

24564 replies

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In response to: Not Coping

creative_writerSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

@Appleblossom just contacted SCBS and still no luck this time. They said try your strategies and contact us back if it doesn’t work. Like I keep trying all my strategies for so long but why isn’t it enough? Maybe it’ll pay off eventually? I don’t know. Yet again, I wasn’t able to feel listened to. All I wanted was someone to listen. I could contact triage, but I am not waiting on hold for more than 5 mins.

@Birdofparadise8 I feel you ❤️.

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

What do you want to talk about? @creative_writer

@Birdofparadise8

What do you ladies think of this

American learning Aussie

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jv8FX7bXfuI

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

Birdofparadise8Senior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

I will have a look when I get home @Appleblossom

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

creative_writerSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

@Appleblossom

TW: trauma I was SA years ago, and the memories feel more vivid than they used to be. I’ve been processing things and it just hurts. My mood has been really unstable. Stress makes me more prone to worse mood episodes. I’ve also been physically unwell, stomach pain from acid and been getting bad migraines frequently. Maybe my MH is taking a toil on my physical well-being. My psych is away. I do have a counsellor appointment but she doesn’t know.

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

@creative_writer Things that helped me stabilise outside of therapy sessions have been gardening and actively making music. I also have done writing too, but for me it is good to get away from words all the time, and use other parts of my body and brain. Some people do mandalas or colouring. I find the writing good to actually find words for my experiences but somehow I need other aspects too.

From what I gather with Sex Abuse the memories are laid down loud and clear as it is all so intense. The best I manage is to contain it, but sometimes it leaks out. I must be in a better space with all my SA as I have been finding ways to have lady laughs in last couple of days which is huge for me as it was all seriously for a long time. I just would never have been able to do that til this year.

What are other things you like that might make it possible to pass the time til your appointments in a better frame of mind?

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

creative_writerSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

@Appleblossom I mostly write poems to process things. I feel like I process things deeper when writing a poem as opposed to journalling because it allows me to use metaphors and imagery to describe the pain. I have doodled before to cope with frustration, the scribbles weren't pretty but who cares. I can look for other avenues too because sometimes I do get writer's block like drawing. Sometimes I also need to allow myself to cry and maybe could hug a teddy. I sure hope that I can move past this and not feel so ashamed and guilty for talking about this. I know they say it's not your fault, but it's hard not to blame myself. I didn't want it to end up like this and it feels like I haven't lived up to expectations.

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

AppleblossomSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

Hearing you about metaphor and processing things with poetry. @creative_writer

Me too.

I think when I was young it was work that helped me push through.

Is it family friend or work expectations?

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

Birdofparadise8Senior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

Hello how are both of you I’m back now finished work @Appleblossom @creative_writer

Hey @Eve7 @Shaz51 @Captain24

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

creative_writerSenior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

@Appleblossom I feel like simple words cannot also grasp the depth of pain or even joy. I don't think I've ever told you, I grew up as a practising Muslim and still am. So I guess I feel shameful for having been SA, even though technically it does not fall onto me because I obviously didn't do anything wrong. But I fear, it's a secret best kept hidden, because if people knew, what would they think of me?

Hi @Birdofparadise8, hope work went okay. How are you feeling? Just winding down now, and I think things have de-escalated a bit, I think I should be okay in keeping myself safe at least for now.

In response to: Re: Tw Not Coping

Birdofparadise8Senior Contributor

Re: Tw Not Coping

Work was okay a bit slow once we got to 6 pm, but never mind @creative_writer

I’m feeling pretty flat right now I just went at sat at my pops house to watch the fireworks because my mum wanted to and it just made me feel really sad because everyone I’d saying happy new year when I don’t feel like it is.

That’s good then I hope you can keep safe.

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

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