I can’t cope

@Captain24 hopefully you're next. It would be good if you could get everything done before your psych appointment, then you can relax.

I could really do with some rest but it's hard to sleep with things being so intense. Oh that's tough, it will be trial and error first of working out how to get it running to your needs but I'm really hoping this can help you with your sleep.

That’s okay @MissGremlin, sometimes the tears just need to come. You’ve been carrying so much, so it makes sense that everything has come out at once. You’ve still managed to get your dishes done and clean your freezer while you were feeling this way, which shows just how hard you’re trying.

If you feel like you need to lie down and close your eyes for a little while afterwards, that’s okay too.

See how you go with your diamond art and try to be gentle with yourself. You’re doing your best to get through this, and right now, getting through one moment at a time is enough. I’m glad you’ve been able to stay connected and that you’ve reached out here when things have felt overwhelming

Always. You deserve support too, especially when you’re the one who is usually there for everyone else 💛

@Nala2022 I've been trying so hard to keep busy, hoping to keep the thoughts/urges at bay.

I've done a tiny bit of diamond art but I'm so tired. I rang my doctors surgery and the person has put an urgent message through to my doctor, so I'm hoping he's able to ring me today. I'm trying really hard to stay present but I keep zoning out and that's scary at the moment with how intense things are. I'm safe for now, I'm going to go and lay on my lounge, hoping I can sleep. Casper is already waiting there for me.

Thankyou sweet ❤️.

Hey @Nala2022 @MissGremlin

Ive just gotten home from the doctor. I’m really disheartened and wanted his time. He seemed annoyed. I just feel like crying but I have my psych in 20 minutes.

He told me I couldn’t do everything at once. He needs the results from my ultrasound before I can start the weight loss needles. He did give me the quit smoking tablets though. I’ll start them tomorrow. He needs to see me regularly while I’m on the needles. It’ll be about 12 months of them. They are expensive but I said to him if I quit smoking that will cover the costs involved. When he asked how much he was a little bit more ok with it.

He did give me a script for the needles but I’m not putting that in until we discover if my ultrasound is clear.

Both if them have side effects. The needles a lot more. But both can mess with your mental health so that is a bit scary. The smoking tablets have usually been ok though. I’m working really hard on my mental health so I’m hoping I can pick up the signs first.

All in all I’m feeling really down and disappointed even though there is plans in place I didn’t feel well treated by my GP just an annoyance.

Im sorry about your shoulder @Nala2022 hopefully you oestio can sort it out for you.

Im sorry it’s all just too hard today @MissGremlin 

I’m sorry you’re feeling so disheartened after your appointment @Captain24 💛

It sounds like you were hoping for a more supportive experience from your GP, so I can understand why you’re feeling upset and like you just want to cry. I'm glad you were able to get the quit smoking tablets though.

Even though today didn’t go how you hoped, you still advocated for yourself and have a plan moving forward, and you’ve got your psych appointment coming up very soon too. I hope you’re able to talk through how you’re feeling with them and get some of the support you need today.

And thank you, hopefully I can get some relief soon 💛

@Captain24 I'm sorry it's left you feeling disheartened sweet, your feelings are valid. I'm glad you've been able to get the stop smoking tablets, that's a start. Hopefully after you've had the ultrasound you'll be able to start the needles. I know there can be alot of side effects, but you do really well to recognise things especially with your mental health.

I hope your psych session goes ok for you sweet. Sending you hugs ❤️

I’m glad you were able to get an urgent message through to your doctor @MissGremlin

You’re doing everything you can right now to stay present and keep yourself safe, and that really matters

It’s okay to rest, especially when you’re feeling so exhausted. Hopefully having Casper beside you gives you a little comfort while you wait to hear from your doctor. Be gentle with yourself and just take things one moment at a time 💛

Thanks @Nala2022

I still feel a little disappointed in how my GP has treated me the last 2 appointments. He didn’t really ask what my plan was.

My psych appointment was great. We talk about his last 2 appointments and how supportive my mum was. She thinks I’m doing the right thing and going about it the rights way. I can’t change everything at once but I will have the tools to start. Slowly start to add a bit of exercise into my routine. Slowly start to change the way I eat. It all needs to be slow so that I can sustain it.

She was really impressed with how I was taking it on board mentally.

I feel a lot better now.

I hope your shoulder goes ok. I possibly won’t be around until Monday.

I hope you have a good weekend

Hey @MissGremlin

I talked it through with my psych and she is actually really impressed with how I’m going about changing my lifestyle and that I’ve given it 6-12 months for all the changes to happen.

We talked about the window of tolerance thing that I’m doing and that I’m now recognising when I’m in the dysregulated stage and how far into it i am at that time.

She is impressed that I didn’t let the ‘fat and lazy’ thought damage everything. Yes I struggled with it but I worked in sorting out solutions and managed to put those thoughts aside to focus on the major goal being fit and healthy!

I hope you are resting. I’m about to cut up the dogs food and then sit down to diamond art. It’ll take me about 20 minutes I think.

My groceries will be here in 10 minutes so I’ll unpack them and then I’m all yours if you want me. If not that’s ok @MissGremlin