I can’t cope

I hurt deep down inside. I want to hurt on the outside to match it.

Im not talking SH and I’m 100% safe. I don’t have the energy not to be.

@Captain24 oh sweetheart i hear you, I'm here with you.

Are you tucked up in bed yet?

I’m in bed @MissGremlin but I can’t get comfortable. The dogs are but they are making it hard for me. Jett is in the way. He has to be touching me or curled up in some nook that I have made by laying in a position. I’m really tired , drained and exhausted. I just need to go to sleep for some peace.

Are you tired yet?

@Captain24 that sounds tough sweet. Are you able to move Jett and get comfy then I'm sure he'll snuggle up with you again.

I'm awake now unfortunately.

I’m sorry @MissGremlin @I fell asleep with my phone in my hand.. I did move Jett and he growled at me! He kept moving during the night as I toss and turn all night. For little dogs they take up a lot of room.

Ive woken up really tired. Im just waiting for my washing to finish and then im going grocery shopping. I need to get stuff to prep meals but I just don’t know what I want. It’s a decision that’s to hard to make.

I hope you got some sleep.

I w been grocery shopping, I’ve cooked one lot of meals and I’m about to cook the next lot. I’ve cleaned my kitchen and unpacked the dishwasher. I’ve cleaned the ensuite. I was going to do the floors but that is just too much.

I will have meals for work and for dinner before work. For breakfast when I get home I just got hot cross buns. It’s probably not enough but I can’t be bothered to do anymore.

Im feeling really bad. I’ve tried really hard to be busy and distract myself but I just can’t do it.

I really just want to curl up in a ball and cry. I despise life. I despise everything. I really wish it was possible to go to hospital. It’s just not an option. I need to be paid, I need a dog sitter and I can’t tell my mum how bad things are. She won’t understand and will just tell me that I’d know how hard things were if I lived her life. I wish I had a supportive family, they just think that I’m crazy. I can’t tell them anything.

I am safe but I just don’t want to go on.

Hello @Captain24 my sweet. You've done amazing do get so much done this morning already.

I hear you when you say you wish you could go to hospital but it's not an option, I'm stuck in that same situation (I'm safe).

I'm here for you sweetheart ❤️. I know i can't do much physically but I'm here to listen and to offer support as much as I can. You are so loved and cared about here ❤️

Hi @Captain24

Sorry to hear about the dogs trying to take over your bed. I hear you and have similar problem.

my male cat weighs about 6kg and, no matter what I do or how I lay, he finds a way to lay on me.

food prep. Is having pre cooked meals in the freezer and option?

years ago when I was having to catch train to and from work and therefore getting home late at night, I used to make and freeze lasagna, shepherds pies, stew.

WOW @Captain24 that’s a lot of things you’ve done this morning. So proud of you. 🤗

wishing I could be there for you. To give you some one to talk to in person, to hold you and give you hugs (if those are things you would be ok with).

is going to bed and having a nap an option?

sending hugs. 🫂🫂

I have meal prepped my other meals, had lunch, done all the dishes that can’t go in the dishwasher, had my night meds and dropped the dogs off. Now to have a shower and go to bed @Flutterbug9 @MissGremlin Hopedully I sleep well enough to get me through night shift.

I don’t cope with frozen meals @Flutterbug9. They make me feel sick at the thought. I spent a lot of time eating lite’n’easy and now I struggle. plus the take so long to microwave at work and we are all trying to heat our dinners.

It would be nice if you were here. Someone that understands and gets it.