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Trying makes it worse

EternalFlowerSenior Contributor

Trying makes it worse

Hi,

I'm EternalFlower and I've been feeling completely overwhelmed, sad, and pessimistic.

I've tried and been a responsible patient and person, reaching out to various services when I started feeling scarily anxious and suicidal, 2 years back..

My Dr is new, a young guy who regularly admits he's inexperienced, and aside from some good jokes, he actually does very little

I notice how easy it is to blame myself that I don't feel better, a total shame spiral, but I wander if my treatments just are bad....

I wanted to chat and hear anyone and hope I can use this space to help not feel so alone.

Thanks xxx EternalFlower

2606 replies

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In response to: Trying makes it worse

tymeModerator

Re: Trying makes it worse

How are you going @EternalFlower ?

Thinking of you and hope you are okay.

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

OaktreeSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower

You have been a bit quiet. I hope you are ok. Thinking of you

x

In response to: Trying makes it worse

PeppyPattiSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hello @EternalFlower

My name is PeppyPatti and last year I changed my support coordinator. . My last support Coordinator was a thief but my therapist sorted her out and got rid of her.

My new Support Coordinator. Is wonderful.

It's taken me about 3 years to get what I want with proper things on place.

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

EternalFlowerSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

hello @PeppyPatti @Oaktree @tyme @tonys @Appleblossom had a suicide attempt last week....i feel a bit woozy but i'm healthy.

i had been praying to be healthy for the last month - i feel it helped me in the cardiac ward - as i recovered quickly and am okay

just emotionally, i need prayers for emotional health, please G-d.....

things are a bit odd for me atm

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

OaktreeSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

@EternalFlower

So sorry for what you have been through and what you are currently experiencing. I know I went through a difficult time after a failed attempt. I was sad and angry for a long time afterwards. It’s a confusing time. I am glad that you are still here. Please take care of yourself

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

lavenderhazeSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower

I am so sorry to hear about how you've been feeling, I can only imagine the pain

Sending you love and hugs ❤️

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

EternalFlowerSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

I'm back in the Ed whi h is hard

It's been a hard time

I feel like I want to end things and I don't have support

It's like everyone is pushing me and doesn't see my true voice

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

FriendlyflutterSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hey @EternalFlower

It must be so hard right now.

What do you mean by you don't have support?

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

lavenderhazeSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower

I can hear how hard things are for you right now and I am so sorry

Are you still in the ED or are you back home?

I'll send a quick check in email, please have a look out ❤️

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

EternalFlowerSenior Contributor

Re: Trying makes it worse

hi there @lavenderhaze @Friendlyflutter @Oaktree

i am really not well supported in with a therapist or much ongoing and am not well enough to engage with some f the programs i have in the public mental health, so i'm managing it alone

i still don't want to live -

i want it over

but i am here, and i am trying

i fought out for my life and i survived and i am graateful for that

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