Welcome! Introduce yourself here 🙂

Hi all,

Not sure what's going on tbh.

After struggling with PND for a few years, I thought I was doing well but seemingly not. Was diagnosed moderate-severe MDD in July and changed meds. Then diagnosed ADHD in September so started some medication. A few ups and downs over the past few months but thought I was ok. Checkup with GP last week and made a plan to increase a med's dosage and then today, after a frosty conversation with my partner (of 22 years), I left the house and felt completely lost. Thoughts just spiralled out of control and I started to think about the worst options. After a few hours, I came home and told my partner I had a feeling to harm myself so I think I should take different meds and go to bed. So here I am. This med has made me calmer I guess but I couldn't sleep and I still feel very much lost and not in control. I'm a bit worried it's due to meds and if that's the case, how am I ever going to be well.

(Chatted with beyond blue and setup beyond now safety plan. Have psychologist appt booked for wed)

So that's the short version. Any advice?

[Edited to removed medication names]

hi @NotElaine

What is MDD ?

Hey @NotElaine

Thanks for posting on the Forums and lovely to have you in the community!

It sounds tough to be dealing with major depressive disorder and you are in the right space to connect with other peers who share similar experiences. There are some other places to post and get involved with discussions or create your own. Have a look at this post Looking for a space to connect with others? Find a... - SANE Forums and it describes some of the space that might interest you.

If you want to chat with someone just at a @ symbol at the beginning of their username and it will tag them and they will get an email to let them know.

Lovely to have in our community!

Take care

RiverSeal

Hi,

I'm 46, am on a Disability Pension as a result of a head injury I sustained in 1996, halfway through my engineering degree. I tried working but couldn't hold an office job down. Years later when I was diagnosed and put on DSP, I got into volunteer woodworking as a form of rehab at a local wooden toy factory. I then built and sold wooden kids' furniture as a hobby from my shed a few years later for about 8 years (2010 - 2018). I found it helped with my depression, it helped me overcome alcoholism and helped re-integrate me into society. I took a few years off due to back problems and grief, but in the last few years, found I needed something to alleviate my anxiety when mum got bladder cancer. I've since got back into hobby woodworking again and make wooden benches, racks, tables, etc. Although I lost my dad in 2016, the stress and isolating experience of caring for my mum during her cancer treatment, have developed a mild form of delayed grief and PTSD. I'm almost out of free counseling sessions from Carer Gateway, so thought I'd see if I could connect with other people in similar situations. I've tried various forms of therapy (writing, meditating, walking, being out in nature), but the I keep coming back to the fact that not working can be very isolating. Hence why I'm here!

In terms of interests, I follow the Crows, F1 racing, even soccer lately although I still don't quite understand the offside rule...

Hi

I'm an older person and I feel invisible and useless

Hi @Cat51 You are definitely not either of those things 💕 We see you, we hear you and we are here to support you. It takes great courage to reach out, so thank you for doing so.

Hi @Cat51

Welcome! You are most definitely seen and heard. As we get older we just need to sometimes 'find ourselves again'. When I went through menopause I was a mess. I felt like I was no longer me and had to re-evaluate everything I knew about myself. I have kids but they no longer needed me as much. I had to think about who am I. Is there anything you really enjoy doing or might like to get involved in? Sometimes feeling good again can be as simple as joining a community group or finding a new hobby.

Would love to hear more from you

Hanami

Hi everyone, my name Ryder And have unmedicated BPD - psychiatrist appointment in 2 weeks

Apart from the fact I pushed away to protect myself. My Triggers have gotten that strong, but I’ve had to alienate myself To stay stable.

Well last nights Episode was a complete meltdown about having no one to turn to.

Dopamine scrolling Call my mum five times so I can talk out loud thought I was trying to process I google support networks and here I am lol

I need a friend

bad

Hey @Ryder ,

Thanks for sharing a little about yourself. Unfortunately, due to anonymity, your picture above couldn't go live. However, the rest of your post has 🙂

I have BPD. Well, let's just say BPD used to rule my life, but now I am in a much better place.

BPD doesn't have to be medicated. It's not medication that 'cures' it. It's talking therapies that makes the difference. I'm actually working on a research paper that looks into BPD therapies.

By the way, just to confirm, when you say BPD, you mean Borderline Personality Disorder?

Having BPD can be lonely at times. I used to feel lonely, but I can't say I do anymore. I've got too much to do to feel lonely.

What do you like to do in your free time?