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no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor24 Sept 2016, 6:05 am AEST

no choices

Gday im 45 just coming out of a divorce where my children have been systematically taken from me after being a stay at home dad for around seven years. My ex walked out claiming she was living a single life anyway . I kept the kids but started to struggle when she locked me out of our joint account . I was in shock and not copping . Her parents bought her a new house . I was struggling to keep food on the table and pay the bills when i decided maybe it would be best if the kids lived with there mum who had financial backing of her parents . Thats when the lawyer letters started claiming i was mentally unfit to see my children...anyway long story ive basically lost every thing now with a 20,000 debt and still dont get to see my kids ...the courts dont even seem to care about anything i have to say im constantly agreeingto her demands to at least get a supervised visit or phone call....now im giving up feeling like the system agrees with her and im better off out of the picture ...ive started saying goodbyes to friends and family ...my heart constantly aches for my boys ..ive missed so much already ...sick of crying and cant function...last ditch effort.

179 replies

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In response to: no choices

Unknown userMember15 Nov 2016, 10:00 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

MensLine Australia: Help, Support & Counselling Services For Men
there are many more if you google, perhaps someone could help you, a close male friend, family member, just to sit with you while you browse through the different sites and see if you can get some support, help - you deserve help - you stood by your children from the start so keep on going for them as well as yourself even though it is so hard

In response to: Re: no choices

Unknown userMember15 Nov 2016, 10:06 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/
HELPLINE 1300 853 437

In response to: no choices

Unknown userMember16 Nov 2016, 9:32 am AEDT

Re: no choices

I too have suffered depression since very young - had a holiday from it for a while - then boom it had slowly crept back. family and friends can be the worst at saying exactly what you don't need. no you cant fix this life none of us can, sorry cant pronounce your name. The system cannot destroy your soul, no one can, it is your soul. the same soul that loves your boys. the same soul that your boys love. do not under any circumstance let anyone or anything destroy your beautiful soul. Not everyone has one, so you keep yours safe. the other stuff will just happen and step by step you will find a way. look at the part that is good in the small picture for now, you can catch up with the bigger picture later. sending you butterflies from other souls.

In response to: no choices

Unknown userMember16 Nov 2016, 9:58 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

yes let the crying come that is the depression expressing physically - yes it hurts - drains - numbs - talk to someone please - look how many people on here are responding to you. all of the contributors on here have experienced suffering of some kind, some still are doing it tough some days, I have had it tough too - external stuff too - pain re my older son again too - life can be so hard and feel overwhelming and then something happens out of the blue - gives you a glimpse of light - talk to someone please - we are all waiting to hear from you - stay with us

In response to: no choices

Unknown userMember16 Nov 2016, 10:00 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

if you ring lifeline and tell them how bad it is they will call an ambulance and take you to emergency at least they do in sa.

In response to: no choices

Unknown userMember17 Nov 2016, 3:59 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

princess molly makes absolute sense - make every second you have with them count- tell them every time you love them so much no matter what they might hear. one thing do not talk about their mother or rest of family at all. keep it about you and children only. your children are growing up and they will observe and listen. your love for them will shine through.

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor24 Nov 2016, 2:26 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

I tell them all the time but hardly hear or see them now the pain is getting overwhelming again i try so hard and nothing matters im giving up but i dont want to why cant i see my kids ive done nothing wrong...

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor24 Nov 2016, 6:52 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Unfortunately its made no difference...contemplating the end again....so sick of trying to live....

In response to: Re: no choices

NikNikSenior Contributor24 Nov 2016, 7:15 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Hi @seamusunsean

I can't imagine what you're going through. It all seems very unfair.

@Former-Member suggested a great resource - http://www.dadsindistress.asn.au/ HELPLINE 1300 853 437 The Helpline is only open between 9-5pm - but please think about connecting with them.

Have you tried them before?

While you're welcome to continue chatting in here tonight, it's really important to contact a crisis service if your comtemplation and urges get stronger:

Lifeline: 13 11 14 or Crisis Chat

Suicide call back service: 1300 659 467 or online counselling

Mensline 1300 789 978

If in immediate danger: 000

May I ask, when did you see your children last?

In response to: no choices

espritSenior Contributor24 Nov 2016, 10:27 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Yeah same for me don't see my kids x is horrid. I just believe they will eventually come to me. My eldest has. Mate just keep busy. My work keeps my mind of it. Days off are torture keep busy.

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